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Princess Gracie: A uniter, not a divider

Per Sandee's request, a moment of kitty zen for my readers who voted for Kerry.

Gracie and the comic boxes

This is Gracie on the shelf of my closet that also holds my comic book collection. It's her step up and down from the top shelf position that you saw last week. Tig, being a guy cat, simply jumps down from the shelf and lands with a floor-shattering thump.

Come to think of it, it seems that Tig is my Hulk kitty. I have shots of him on the comics somewhere, because he has to go up in stages, what with him being too fat and the shelf being too high, anyway. I'll go look for them and post at a later date.

By the way, both of them woke me up last night. Gracie decided she needed some loving at 2 a.m. Tig figured on 5 a.m., the time when my alarm goes off when I work The Job From Hell (which I am working again, due to unfortunate circumstances all around). I do not have to work until noon today. I was not pleased.

And could either of them wake me up from the horrible dream I was having about my right incisor falling to pieces and falling out? No, of course not. (I regularly dream about my teeth falling apart and falling out when I am stressed. I am stressed right now.) They were sleeping soundly while I was struggling with what I thought was a perfectly healthy tooth, only to find it in a zillion pieces in my hand. I find myself unconsciously checking that tooth every few minutes to make sure it's still there. Nasty dream. Brrrr.

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Friday open thread

Well, all of the cool kids do it. I may as well try it. I worked two jobs today, for a total of ten hours, and sat down for exactly 35 minutes of those ten hours, excluding travel time. Now I'm going to eat something and go to synagogue.

Talk amongst yourselves.

Update: Boy, you folks really need to work on this, don't you?

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Friday open thread

Well, all of the cool kids do it. I may as well try it. I worked two jobs today, for a total of ten hours, and sat down for exactly 35 minutes of those ten hours, excluding travel time. Now I'm going to eat something and go to synagogue.

Talk amongst yourselves. | |



Filling the Day By Day void: Reruns!

Since Chris won't be back for another month, I was thinking we could fill the Day By Day void by posting links to our favorite strips.

This one is mine.

Over to you, fellow bloggers and blog readers. If you want to post the HTML as a link in the comments box, here's how.

Below is what an HTML link looks like.


When you paste that into the comments box, it looks like this:


If you do a view source on the above line, you'll see about the same exact thing as I've typed up there. I'd explain what everything means, but then your brains would explode. Suffice to say that the quote marks are critical, the open and close brackets even more so, and the </a> is the only way to close the anchor tag and get it to work. If it's too difficult, just paste it as text. I'll edit them when I get home from work tomorrow.

If you really want to make things easy, copy and paste my line above and change the cartoon date to whichever one you pick, and THIS IS MY LINKED PHRASE to something that makes sense in your sentence.

Or not. Could be funny the other way., the weblog that teaches you everything you never asked to know. | |

Latest on Arafat: He's brain-dead

UPI says he's gone.

WASHINGTON -- Medical sources in Paris have confirmed to this correspondent that Palestinian leader Yasser Arafat is in a state of "cerebral death." The official word from the French hospital and Palestinian officials in the French capital is that Arafat is "in a coma." In other words Arafat is "brain dead" and on life support. It is now a matter of time -- more when, rather than if -- his death becomes a reality.

Let's face it. He's dead, and only machines are keeping him alive. He's no longer an Arafish, he's an Aravegetable. And he's going to be rotten soon enough. | |

Reading material while we wait for confirmation

Reuters readers and subscribers, making their way through this utterly whitewashed piece of fluff biography of the world's ugliest, oldest, and most despicable terrorist, might think that Israel just picked on him for no apparent reason. So here's a list of other stories that give you the truth about Arafat, the mass-murderer, thief, child corrupter, liar, and most unstatesmanlike person ever to win the Nobel Peace Prize.

Arafat lying to the entire world while pretending to sign the Oslo peace agreement.

Arafat's Ugly Legacy, by Zev Chafetz

Michelle Malkin has a linkfest on the years of blood and terror

The most damning analysis of all:

But Arafat's lasting and most pernicious legacy is that he has contributed to completely changing the Palestinian psyche. The Palestinians were once the most secular, tolerant and educated people in the Arab world. Today, Palestinian classrooms have become the hotbeds of recruitment for jehad. Large portraits of suicide bombers adorn the walls of classrooms. According to surveys, at least 70 per cent of Palestinians support suicide bombings. Have you ever heard a speech by Arafat in which he encourages young people to get a good education and work towards building a strong Palestinian state?

And there's the Munich blogburst from last year, memorializing Arafat's contribution to the Olympics: Kidnapped and murdered athletes. My posts on the matter (one and two are synopses of the blogburst, three is my own thoughts): One, Two, Three.

Do not honor this man. Do not praise him. He was a murderer, and he changed the face of what is an acceptable political statement, with the aid of millions of fools and Jew-haters.

Most of all, do not whitewash his past, Al-Reuters. There is not a single, solitary mention of terrorism in that article, except for Arafat's lie that he renounced it. But then, what do you expect from a wire service that admits they don't write articles critical of terrorists for fear of their correspondents' lives? | |

Arafat Deathwatch: Updates

Reuters says Arafat is only clinically dead.

Palestinian President Yasser Arafat was declared clinically dead on Thursday in a French hospital, Israeli television said citing French sources.

But Palestinian Prime Minister Ahmed Qurie denied the report, saying: "I have just spoken to the officials in Paris and they say the situation is still as it was. He is still in the intensive care unit."

Israel's Channel Two television cited unnamed sources in Paris saying that Arafat underwent a brain scan and was found to be "no longer alive."

Israelly Cool has some excellent commentary and updates.

And remember, it is in the best interests of the PA not to have Arafat dead. They need to have him as a puppet so they can continue his murderous, thieving ways. Or prevent some kind of civil war as the remaining terrorists grab for the power. Here's hoping they do eliminate each other. I'd be perfectly happy to have Hanan Ashrawi be the only remaining senior palestinian leader left. I may disagree with every word she says, but she hasn't ever sent teenagers out with bombs strapped to their chests. | |

Arafat is dead! Let the rejoicing begin!

From Erica S.: AFP pronounces the end of the murderer.

AFP: 11/4/2004
Veteran Palestinian leader Yasser Arafat died Thursday in a hospital in France, Israeli private television and military radio reported.

The 75-year-old had been treated at a military hospital on the outskirts of Paris since being flown out of his West Bank headquarters on Friday.

Doctors in Paris had earlier said that Arafat was in a coma while his top advisor had said that he was in a critical condition.

11/04/2004 16:29 GMT - AFP

Tig and Gracie are getting tunafish today.

Update: Brokaw says the French hospital denies this story. We shall see. | |

Arafat in coma; terrorist-haters the world over about to erupt in joy

I do believe I'm going to break out into song. Here's the first part of it, to the tune of American Pie:

Bye-bye Mr. Terrorist Guy
Now you're dying we're not crying 'cause your death, it is nigh
And those good ol' Jews you tried to make go bye-bye
Are still here and will be here when you're gone
Are still here and will be here when you're gone

Gotta work on the body of the song parody. It'll be a while.

And please, save me the lectures on how I shouldn't be happy that a mass-murderer of Jews, Christians, and Muslims is on his deathbed. I hope he's in great pain. He's caused more than enough to thousands, no, millions, if you count what he did to his own people.

And remember, get those checkbooks ready. Magen David Adom is gonna make some money today, with any luck. | |

The Dead Dictators Pool Matching Fund

Warm up those checkbooks, folks: Someone must have told Yasser Arafat the results of the election and it sent him back into intensive care. This time, it might be for real.

We just might get a twofer this week. His excrescence Sheik Zayed bin Sultan Al Nahyan, the founder and main moneyman of the execrable (the word for today) and now-defunct Zayed Center, died this week.

The way this matching fund works is that I'm donating $25 to Magen David Adom for each dead Arab dictator on my Dead Pool list that scores. If Arafat goes, so does my money—and so does some of yours. I have a list of nine donors who will match my $25, and I'll be emailing you all privately the day that Arafat buys it.

If anyone wants to join in, either sign up here in the comments, or email me privately if you're more comfortable that way. I'll send out a blind carbon copy list.

By the way, if anyone wants to donate any money to MDA just for the heck of it, feel free. | |



Today's moment of kitty zen

Per Sandee's request. Tig says: Chill out, man. I'm on the sofa, and she hasn't chased me off yet.

Tig is on the couch

Can't we all just get along?

Sure. Tomorrow. Honest. | |

Kerry voters' reaction to Bush's re-election

The sky is falling!

Click for larger image.

(I never signed the no-gloating pledge. I'm giving myself 24 hours to gloat.)

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Three things Bush's re-election mean to me

1. The war does trump everything.

2. Americans to mainstream media: Eff you. We can make up our own minds.

3. Michael Moore is a very, very unhappy man this morning.

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More election thoughts

Lynn B. and I have been talking on and off tonight. Both she and I are lifelong Democratic voters who voted for Bush and are watching the results anxiously. But both she and I are seeing very heartening trends. Florida has been steadily for Bush all evening. Wisconsin is holding steadily Bush. And now Ohio and Michigan are heading towards the Bush camp. I'm thinking it's going to be a re-election.

And if so, there are three things I think Bush's re-election will mean to the American public and the world.

But you'll have to wait until tomorrow to hear them. | |

SFSU palestinian students mob college Republicans

History repeats itself: First, they came for the Jews. Then they came for the Republicans.

Derek Wray, President of the SFSU College Republicans, told Front Page Magazine that an angry mob of Palestinian students attacked the club’s table, as well as individual members of the Republican club who were handing out pro-Bush/Cheney campaign materials. According to Wray, campus police were nearby, but “just stood around watching and, instead of protecting the College Republican students from the mob that was pouring drinks on our table and materials, and even physically assaulting our members, only suggested that the campus Republicans leave rather than arrest those responsible for the violence.”

Sometimes, they come for both:

Wray said the incident began when four Palestinian women from the General Union of Palestinian Students (GUPS) on the S.F. State campus approached the CRs’ table and began a verbal tirade. “You and the Jews want to kill all the Muslims!” one screamed at Wray. “You and Ariel Sharon want to kill innocent Palestinian babies.” A larger crowd of male Arab students then joined in creating a threatening mob in front of the table.

It got pretty ugly.

“When one of the Republican students asked one of the women that if she hated America so much, why she didn’t leave, she screamed at him ‘I have some pride. I would strap a bomb on myself and blow myself up as a suicide bomber rather than call myself an American,’”according to Wray. He said the woman also ranted that terrorists are “freedom fighters.”

“One woman said she’d blow up the College Republicans on campus,” Wray continued. “They began throwing food at us and even tried to tip over our table.” The campus police did nothing. Instead of separating them from our table, they kept pulling me aside and asking if we were willing to leave.”

One of the Arab women even began hitting one of the male college Republicans who deflected her blows with his arms. “She got right into his face screaming and trying to hit him. When he deflected one of her blows she then yelled to the male Arabs present that the Republican student was hitting a woman.”

If this sounds familiar, read the link to the SFSU anti-Semitic riot from 2002. Here's an excerpt:

As soon as the community supporters left, the 50 students who remained praying in a minyan for the traditional afternoon prayers, or chatting, or cleaning up after the rally, talking -- were surrounded by a large, angry crowd of Palestinians and their supporters. But they were not calling for peace. They screamed at us to "go back to Russia" and they screamed that they would kill us all, and other terrible things.

They surrounded the praying students, and the elderly women who are our elder college participants, who survived the Shoah, who helped shape the Bay Area peace movement, only to watch as a threatening crowd shoved the Hillel students against the wall of the plaza. I had invited members of my Orthodox community to join us, members of my Board of Visitors, and we stood there in despair. Let me remind you that in building the SFSU Jewish Studies program, we asked the same people for their support and that our Jewish community, who pay for the program once as taxpayers and again as Jews, generously supports our program. Let me remind you that ours is arguably one of the Jewish Studies programs in the country most devoted to peace, justice and diversity since our inception.

As the counter demonstrators poured into the plaza, screaming at the Jews to "Get out or we will kill you" and "Hitler did not finish the job," I turned to the police and to every administrator I could find and asked them to remove the counter demonstrators from the Plaza, to maintain the separation of 100 feet that we had been promised.

The police told me that they had been told not to arrest anyone, and that if they did, "it would start a riot." I told them that it already was a riot. Finally, Fred Astren, the Northern California Hillel Director and I went up directly to speak with Dean Saffold, who was watching from her post a flight above us. She told us she would call in the SF police. But the police could do nothing more than surround the Jewish students and community members who were now trapped in a corner of the plaza, grouped under the flags of Israel, while an angry, out of control mob, literally chanting for our deaths, surrounded us. Dr. Astren and I went to stand with our students.

Apparently, the palestinian students have learned nothing in the last two years. But that's not surprising. They weren't really punished. But one of the Jewish students was expelled.

Expect more on this story. I just got off the phone with one of the people involved. | |

Real-time Virginia results

Okay, I can't stay away from the results. If you want to see real-time Virginia results, go here. About half the precincts have already reported, and Lynn B. can attest that I called Virginia before any of the networks.

I'm sure I'll be back with more. | |

Avoiding the issues

Here's the thing: I simply can't obsess about who's going to win today. I voted, and yes, I voted for a Republican—two of them, actually—for the first time in my life. I spent the morning and early afternoon working at the gym, which was rather soothing, actually. Then I did a bit of food shopping, staring wistfully at the potato chips, because it's been over a week since I've had fried food of any kind. I still haven't kicked that stomach thing, and I have had no milk and no fried foods since last weekend. Okay, so I'm losing weight—but you have no idea how hard it is for me not to have even oven-roasted potatoes. Mashed potatoes, with a bit of margarine, is all I've dared.

So. I'm going to tend to business tonight and drain the brains of this computer and pour it onto my new one, and with any luck, I won't screw it up. I'm going to work on a photograph of Sorena bashing the Count Olaf's foot pinata at her birthday party. I'm going to watch last night's episode of The Gilmore Girls and hope for more shots of Scott Patterson's naked chest (please, please, please!). I'll tune in the news around ten or eleven, and then go to bed before midnight, because I want to be healthy tomorrow.

I hope Bush wins. But I won't be obsessing over it. And I'm too cranky to post about Israel right now, though I may do so later. Lots of articles on the daily alert that pissed me off big-time.

However, I'll leave you on an upbeat note. When I got home from the market, I was putting groceries away and discovered a putrefying lettuce (thankfully, in a Zip-lock bag) in my crisper. Out it went to the garbage can on my next trip to the car, but first, I saw three young boys, about eight years old or so, playing outside. "Hey guys!" I said. "Wanna see something gross?"


Heh. Kids are a hoot. Best line from them: "That was a lettuce? I thought it was some kind of meat. EW!"

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Vote early, vote late, but vote

There are several things to say on this Election Day. For my Jewish readers: First, before you vote, here are a few things to think about. This is from the stepson of the Democratic candidate for President:

October 31, 2004 -- THIS campaign is ending just in time before someone gets hurt. John Kerry's stepson, Chris Heinz, 31, displayed his mother Teresa's famous lack of rhetorical restraint at a recent campaign event with a group of Wharton students. Philadelphia magazine reports: "Heinz accused Kerry's opponents - 'our enemies' - of making the race dirty. 'We didn't start out with negative ads calling George Bush a cokehead,' he said, before adding, 'I'll do it now.' Asked later about it, Heinz said, 'I have no evidence. He never sold me anything.'" Heinz also reminded writer Sasha Issenberg of Pat Buchanan by saying, "One of the things I've noticed is the Israel lobby - the treatment of Israel as the 51st state, sort of a swing state." Buchanan was blasted as an anti-Semite years ago when he cited Israel's "amen corner" in Congress.

From Charles Krauthammer, conservative political columnist:

He really does want to end America's isolation. And he has an idea how to do it. For understandable reasons, however, he will not explain how on the eve of an election.

Think about it: What do the Europeans and the Arab states endlessly rail about in the Middle East? What (outside Iraq) is the area of most friction with U.S. policy? What single issue most isolates America from the overwhelming majority of countries at the United Nations?

The answer is obvious: Israel.

In what currency, therefore, would we pay the rest of the world in exchange for their support in places like Iraq? The answer is obvious: giving in to them on Israel.

No Democrat will say that openly. But anyone familiar with the code words of Middle East diplomacy can read between the lines. Read what former Clinton national security adviser Sandy Berger said in ``Foreign Policy for a Democratic President,'' a manifesto written while he was a senior foreign policy adviser to Kerry.

``As part of a new bargain with our allies, the United States must re-engage in ... ending the Israeli-Palestinian conflict. ... As we re-engage in the peace process and rebuild frayed ties with our allies, what should a Democratic president ask of our allies in return? First and foremost, we should ask for a real commitment of troops and money to Afghanistan and Iraq.''

There is also this from Joel Engel:

[...] Meanwhile, at a speech in Liverpool early this year, Moore informed his adoring audience who the world's real villains are: "It's all part of the same ball of wax, right? The oil companies, Israel, Halliburton." That statement sheds light on why he tried to prevent Fahrenheit 9/11 from being shown in Israel, and is congruent with both his speech denouncing the Israeli "occupation" at a 1990 Washington, D.C. demonstration, and his refusal that same year to attend a screening of his film Roger and Me in Jerusalem unless and until Israel met his demand to withdraw from "Arab lands."

If you're Jewish, and you vote for Kerry, you are voting for the party that refuses to censure Jim Moran, who said openly that Jews and the Israel lobby were behind the war in Iraq, and who suffered nothing for it. For the party who did not call Jesse Jackson to account for his "Hymietown" remark.

For those of you for whom Israel is a non-issue, there's this from Michael Moore, who sat in a place of honor next to Jimmy Carter at the Democratic National Convention. This is from the man whom Osama bin Laden quoted in his latest video. This is the level of discourse that the Democrats have fallen to:

To George W.:

I know it’s gotta be rough for you right now. Hey, we’ve all been there. “You’re fired” are two horrible words when put together in that order. Bin Laden surfacing this weekend to remind the American people of your total and complete failure to capture him was a cruel trick or treat. But there he was. 3,000 people were killed and he’s laughing in your face. Why did you stop our Special Forces from going after him? Why did you forget about bin Laden on the DAY AFTER 9/11 and tell your terrorism czar to concentrate on Iraq instead?

There he was, OBL, all tan and rested and on videotape (hey, did you get the feeling that he had a bootleg of my movie? Are there DVD players in those caves in Afghanistan?)

How can he be proud of the fact that a mass murderer used his talking points in a taped message that once again threatens Americans? This is what the Democrats have decided is a man who deserves to be held in respect at their national convention?

I may never vote Democratic ever again. I'm voting for Eric Cantor, the only Jewish Republican in the House; for George W. Bush, and for an independent challenger for school board. The only Democrat who gets my vote tomorrow is Douglas Wilder, and that's partly because he pushed for the city of Richmond to change the way it picks its mayor from one of elitist selection by the City Council to direct election by the people. I respect the man's record as Governor of Virginia, and will vote for him to run my city.

I'll be working in the morning and afternoon, and will be back after I vote. I really hope I don't run into any annoying poll watchers tomorrow, because I'm still cranky and still not 100% healthy yet, and writing this post hasn't improved my mood at all.

One last note: Go visit Michele and Alan's Command Post for the up-to-the-second news on elections as they happen, without the insufferable spin from the news media. | |



Mainstream media goes for Kerry; dog bites man

Editor & Publisher has been keeping a tally of newspaper endorsements. You can go here to see who endorsed whom in a state-by-state tally. To no one's surprise, Kerry has the majority of endorsements.

NEW YORK In the near-final tally of editorial endorsements, President Bush narrowed the gap on Sen. John Kerry today, picking up 21 mostly smaller papers compared to the challenger's five new additions. This brings the count of daily papers to 208-188 in favor of Kerry.

Since our last count, several weeklies on both sides were deleted because we are only covering paid dailies.

Kerry continues to easily hold the edge in the circulation of papers supporting him by a roughly 4-3 margin. And two more papers that backed Bush in 2000 have declared their neutrality: The News-Press in Fort Myers, Fla., and The Press of Atlantic City, in New Jersey.

More than 60 papers that backed Bush in 2000 have now switched to Kerry or endorsed neither candidate. Fewer than 10 switched the other way after backing Al Gore in 2000.

One huge oversight: Editor & Publisher doesn't link to the online editorials. Considering how many newspapers now have online presences, that's very old-media of them.

Click on the link to see where your local paper stands. | |

Arafat's PR department at work

Wire services are reporting that Arafat condemned today's suicide bombing in Tel Aviv.

I don't buy it.

Here's the Reuters report:

Arafat called a senior aide by telephone to condemn a suicide bombing that killed three people and the bomber in Tel Aviv on Monday.

[...] "He (Arafat) condemned the attack in Tel Aviv and said that he condemns the killing of civilians on both sides," Abu Rdainah said in Paris after receiving the call.

Arafat appealed to all Palestinian factions to avoid killing Israeli civilians and called on Prime Minister Ariel Sharon to avoid killing Palestinians, he said.

A Reuters correspondent with Abu Rdainah heard Arafat speaking during the call.

All that tells me is that the aide said Arafat condemned the bombing, and the Reuters reporter heard one side of a conversation. It does not confirm that Arafat condemned the bombing.

The AP report:

Palestinian leaders - including Arafat - immediately condemned the attack, the first since a Sept. 22 bombing in Jerusalem.

From a military hospital near Paris, Arafat "appealed to all Palestinian factions to commit to avoid harming all Israeli civilians and he appealed to (Israeli Prime Minister Ariel) Sharon to take similar initiatives to avoid harming Palestinian civilians," Arafat's spokesman Nabil Abu Rdeneh said.

Abu Rdeneh relayed the statement to reporters as Arafat's wife, Suha, dictated it to him by cell phone. Later, Arafat took the phone and asked Abu Rdeneh to make sure the statement was circulated. Abu Rdeneh told the 75-year-old Arafat - in France since Friday for treatment of an unknown disease - to take care of himself.

There is nothing on the PNA website. There's nothing about it on the Press Center. There are only palestinian spokesliars' words that he said such a thing. Let's look at some of his "condemnations" of the past:

"I repeat our condemnation of this tragic operation and to all operations that result in the killing of civilians, Israelis or Palestinians," Arafat said. "We will now exert our utmost efforts to stop the bloodshed of our people and the Israeli people and to do all that is needed to achieve an immediate and unconditional, real and effective cease-fire."

Another one, more recent, on the Taba bombing:

In a letter addressed to Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak, Arafat wrote: "On my behalf and on behalf of the Palestinian leadership and the Palestinian people, we express our true feelings of solidarity with the families of the victims and send our condolences to them ."

He sent no such letter to Israel, though the bombs were aimed at Israelis.

Let us also remember that palestinian terrorists do not think any Israelis are to be considered civilians, as there is compulsory service in the IDF for men and women. I highly doubt the claims that Arafat condemned the bombing, going on his past behavior. Frankly, as far as we know, he's still making no more sense than Elmer Fudd, millionaire.

I think we're going to see a lot of statements purportedly from Arafat over the next few weeks. The puppet master is going through a puppet stage, it seems. | |

Naked jealousy dept.

Effing Treacher is in the Wall Street Journal. Glenn was right. The end is nigh.

Effing Treacher is in the Wall Street Journal. Yes, that's right. Effing Treacher. For this, he must die. But not Puce. I'm starting to fall for Puce. | |

Reading between the lines

This is a very image-ridden, poetic piece in the Globe and the Mail about the 20 wanted men hiding behind Arafat's skirts in the Muqata the last few years. The article says almost nothing, frankly. Let me give you a more straightforward interpretation, starting with the most important information in the piece—which the author buried halfway down f the article:

On Thursday, close to midnight, the ghosts finally vanished, exorcised by the imminent departure of Mr. Arafat, their patron and protector, for medical treatment in Paris. They walked out through the front gate carrying their weapons, and vanished into the night.

These are twenty of the most-wanted terrorists in the territories. Arafat has been protecting them for three years. He's in Paris, and they didn't get to go with him. This is fabulous news, because now, they're going to be in areas where the IDF can hunt them down with impunity. Get ready for more targeted killings, as well as shootouts with these mass murderers. If someone can find me a list of these twenty killers, perhaps we can get a Magen David Adom fund going: Every time one of them gets killed or captured, readers contribute a buck or five to MDA.

In any event, my prediction: Watch the "ghosts" start turning into corpses, courtesy of the IDF. | |

Less than zero

The IDF has reduced operations in the territories "out of respect" for Arafat's condition. How do the palestinians repay this action?

By murdering more Israelis.

In Tel Aviv.

Anyone who still thinks the pals wants peace should have their heads examined.

Oh, and it was another war crime upon war crimes: The bomber was sixteen years old. The palestinians recruit and use child soldiers, which are explicitly against many UN decrees, and of course, the world says nothing.

The headline for this post? What I think of the animals who use suicide bombs as a "political statement." And what I think of those who support them. Tears for terrorists, but I'm betting Barbara Plett will be shedding no tears for the victims today.

As I feared, Arafat's current illness doesn't seem to bet fatal. So after living in the lap of publicity for some weeks, on which Arafat thrives, he'll be coming back to his two-room shack in Ramallah and ordering more terrorist attacks.

That's what Israel gets for being kind to her enemies. Perhaps someday she'll learn to be as ruthless to them as they are to her. | |



Election omens: What's in a name?

You can't turn around without finding another story on election "omens." If the Washington Redskins win their last home game before the election, the incumbent wins. (Though if you ask me, that's more an indicator that the Redskins have been a sucky football team for decades than anything else.) The Weekly Reader poll. Halloween masks. The World Series winner.

Well, being no slouch in the meaningless facts department, I decided to do the election omens the new-fashioned way: I'm Googling the candidates in a variety of ways, and ew, doesn't that sound dirty? Ew. Ew. Ew. Okay, not so much with W., who is at least fairly attractive, but Kerry? Ew.

Oh. Um. My newfangled omens. Right.

So here we go. The Google omens:

Googlewars: George vs. John. Uh-oh, Mr. President.

Googlewars 2: Bush vs. Kerry. And it's a landslide for the incumbent!

Googlewars 3: George Bush vs. John Kerry: The President pulls it out.

Googlewars 4: George W. Bush vs. John F. Kerry: Landslide for the Prez again!

Googlewars 5: Chimp vs. Flipper: Kerry wins. (I'm not sure I'd like to claim that one as a victory.)

Googlewars 6: I hate Bush vs. I hate Kerry: Kerry by a Googlanch. Yikes!

Googlewars 7: Bush sucks vs. Kerry sucks: Oh, my, Kerry by another Googlanch. Talk about your unpopular popularity.

Googlewars 8: Vote for Bush vs. Vote for Kerry: Kerry by another Googlanch. Finally, a positive landslide for the Senator from Massachusetts.

Googlewars 9: Texas vs. Massachusetts. Sorry, Lone-Star Staters, but you lose, badly.

Googlewars 10: None of the Above. This one beats John Kerry, Vote for Kerry, Kerry Sucks, I Hate Kerry, Flipper, George W. Bush, and, oh, never mind, figure it out yourself. Most of the above. Somehow, I don't think ol' None is going to win the election, though.

(Note: If you feel like checking on Nader's stats, they're all about what you would figure: Marginal to the major players.)

There you have the facts. What do they mean?

If I read the signs correctly, I think they mean that Google's search engine can find a lot of different Bush and Kerry terms.

Yes, I know. They should pay me for analysis like this, but alas, they do not. | |


Last week's blogs are archived. Looking for the Buffy Blogburst Index? Here's Israel vs. the world. Here's the Blogathon. The Superhero Dating Ratings are here. If you're looking for something funny, try the Hulk's solution to the Middle East conflict, or Yasser Arafat Secret Phone Transcripts. Iseema bin Laden's diary is also a good bet if you've never been here before.