My thoughts on international women’s day

If I were in elementary school, I’d probably have to write an essay about what I think of womon on international women’s day. In that spirit, I think I shall write an essay. (Tip: I think it’s going to change from elementary school Meryl to adult Meryl partway through.)

I think that women are cool. I’m a woman, and many of my friends of women. Of course, some women are real jerks. They are mean to me and each other and to other people.

About half the world’s people are women. I don’t understand why there is a day devoted to them. But there is a mother’s day and a father’s day and a grandparents day but there isn’t a men’s day. Why is that? That’s not fair. Men should have a day, too.

I don’t want any presents because it’s international women’s day, because I think that would be stupid. In fact, I think this whole day is stupid because days like this are meaningless exercises for people to blather about rights and place and what has or has not happened in their unicorn-filled utopic worldview. It’s a toothless way to complain about women’s rights. If the world really cared about women’s rights, it would start in places like the Islamic nations where women have little or no rights. In Saudi Arabia, a woman cannot drive a car, travel out of the country without her husband’s permission, divorce her husband, get custody of her children if he divorces her, or mix with unmarried men. In many Muslim nations, a woman’s testimony counts for less than a man’s. In Afghanistan, girls are shot for attending school. In Iran, women and men can’t sit together and watch a soccer game. In many Muslim countries, women have an enforced dress code and are punished physically if they don’t adhere to it. In India and China, girls are aborted in the womb or even pout outside to die because sons are more desirable. There is now an imbalance of men to women in those two nations, and gender-related abortions are catching on in the West.

What is international women’s day going to do about things like this?

Nothing. China, Kuwait, Indonesia, Pakistan, Saudi Arabia, and United Arab Emirates sit on the UN Human Rights Council. If the UN actually cared about women’s rights, none of these nations would have a seat on the council.

But rest assured, we’ll hear about pay inequalities in America, violence against women worldwide, and tsk-tsk about the lack of women’s rights in Muslim countries in a rare few articles. And nothing will be done.

But a lot of words will be blathered. And that’s important. Because it’s International Women’s Day, dammit!

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