The next James Bond movie will be called…

The Man With The Plastic Gun:

Israeli police commandos stormed the British Embassy late Thursday and captured a Palestinian gunman who had scaled the fence and demanded political asylum. There were no reports of injuries.

The gunman, who had burst into the embassy several hours earlier, was disarmed, said the police officials, who spoke on condition of anonymity because they weren’t authorized to talk to the media.

Later reports state that he had a plastic gun.

So, what gives? He saw a bunch of so-called palestinian “security forces” marching with wooden rifles and believed that the Israelis were armed with similar hardware?

“Our wooden rifles are no match for his plastic gun! Quick! Call the commando units with their wooden rifles wrapped in aluminum foil!”

In typical AP fashion, the headline says “Israeli Police Storm British Embassy.”

You know, because “Israeli Police Capture Palestinian Gunman” or “Israeli Police Secure British Embassy” would make too much sense and actually sound positive.

I take back my earlier statements that every AP staffer who pulls this blatantly biased crap should have a flaming typewriter shoved up their ass.

(They should shove two flaming typewriters shoved up their asses.)

About Laurence Simon

I'm a thirty-something dataschmuck in Houston, TX. I spend my free time grilling, baking, playing with cats, and trying to invent the Tequila Sunset.
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5 Responses to The next James Bond movie will be called…

  1. Clairification–did he have a TOY gun, or working plastic gun? Some very fine and deadly guns are made in plastics.

  2. Dan says:

    How about a flaming typewriter dropped on their head……..

  3. sultan knish says:

    Alternative AFP headline

    ‘Zionist Outpost on British soil leads to Violence’

  4. Paul says:

    Hey I have a flamethrower if you need it ! :)

  5. Joel says:

    The A.P. is not even half as bad as al-Reuters.

Comments are closed.