The Hulk is guest-blogging here again:
Hulk go to new Hulk movie. Hulk was hoping it better than stupid movie girl took Hulk to last time. Stupid movie had giant dogs. Hulk in movie smash giant dogs, but that just stupid. Hulk like dogs. Hulk not want to smash dogs. New Hulk movie was better. No giant dogs!
Betty in this movie not boring, girl says. Girl says this movie Betty play same role every single movie she in. Hulk not know what “role” means. Girl says movie Betty just has to look pretty and be love interest. Oh. Hulk get that. Movie Betty good at that. But movie Betty not as pretty as real Betty.
Hulk like this movie. Lots more fighting. Hulk wins every fight. Hulk always wins fights. Hulk is the strongest one there is. Movie Hulk fought big ugly monster. Hulk can’t say monster name. Girl say it for me. Girl will speak now.
It’s the Abomination, Hulk.
That stupid name.
Well, uh, yeah. But I didn’t make it up.
Hulk will call him Ugly Monster. What girl think?
I think that’s a great name, Hulk.
Girl always agree with Hulk. Girl smart.
Hell, yeah!
Hulk fought army men, too. Why do soldiers always fight with Hulk? Hulk not bother soldiers. But soldiers always follow Hulk, always try to hurt him. Movie Hulk same as real Hulk. Movie Hulk smash soldiers.
Actually, Hulk, I think they broke the Hulk Smash rule in this one. The movie Hulk killed a bunch of people. Comic book Hulk never does.
That right. Hulk not kill soldiers, even though soldiers always try to hurt Hulk! Hulk just smash soldiers! Where soldiers? Hulk will smash them!
They’re just movie soldiers, Hulk. No soldiers here. No! Wait! Not the door again!
Crap. Now I have to get a new door. Again.
Well, this Hulk movie was excellent. They didn’t waste the first 45 minutes trying to give you Hulk’s raison d’smash. There’s a three-minute backstory while the credits roll, and then you’re in the movie. I liked Ed Norton as Bruce Banner. I liked William Hurt as Thunderbolt Ross. And Liv Tyler was a great Betty. All she really had to do was look lovingly at Bruce/The Hulk, and she’s got that down to a science now. And best of all: No giant mutant poodles. Just the Abomination, with a slightly different origin, but hey, it worked for me.
A few chuckles, but overall, don’t go into the Hulk expecting the same experience as Iron Man. Iron Man was funny. Hulk is dark, which it rather has to be. The only disturbing part, for me, was breaking the Hulk-never-kills-anyone rule. I know it defies logic that the Hulk never kills anyone, but hey, he’s a comic book character. We get to bend the rules for comic books. (That’s how the Jack Kirby Hulk can grab a chunk of asphalt and make it go up and down in waves like a carpet, instead of just breaking off in his hands, as it would do in reality.)
And yes, we do see a return of the purple pants.
Best news is the cameo at the end of the film. The Avengers movie can’t be very far behind. And word is the next Hulk villain will be: The Leader. Woo-hoo!
No, the best news is the box office estimate: Looking good. $21 million on Friday night.
This is a great summer for comic book movies.