Iran to Syria: Give us back the uranium we illegally sold you. And oh yeah—do it on your own damned dime. Wow, this one’s just awesome. Iran wants Syria to return the uranium it was supposed to use in the nuclear plant that Israel bombed so that, well, Syria couldn’t make a nuclear bomb. I hope they do try it. And the IDF intercepts the ship. That would be fun.

No Security Council resolution on Goldstone: Israel and the White House have apparently reached a “silent understanding” on not letting Goldstone reach the Security Council. How long before the Palestinians and the OIC get noisy about the silence? I figure a day or two.

The Palestinian Lobby trumps the Israel lobby. Hillary Clinton has now been spanked by just about all the major players in the Middle East for daring to suggest that a total settlement freeze should not be a precondition to peace talks. And she has been properly repentant:

US Secretary of State Hillary Rodham Clinton said Washington does not accept the legitimacy of Israeli settlements in the West Bank and wants to see their construction halted “forever.”

That’s funny. I thought it was the Israel lobby that was powerful enough to force the U.S. President to dance to its tune, and yet, here she is, slamming Israel only days after saying that Netanyahu made “unprecedented” steps toward freezing settlement construction. Huh. Go figure. That Walt & Mearsheimer—boy, they really pulled one over on the world, hey?

Awesome: Congressional nitwit puts private ethics investigation data on public website. You have to love the internet age, because people being people, there are still just as many idiots as there were before everything was online. Only now when they make mistakes, we get to see what’s really going on behind the scenes in Congress.

Postcards from the IDF: Yossi Klein Halevi on Israeli citizens’ receipt of a postcard that details how much time they have to get to the nearest bomb shelter in the event of a missile attack. A sobering read.

No. Ya think? Best headline yet on the Iran cheat-and-retreat strategy: “Iran accused of playing games on nuclear deal.” The Telegraph wins the Keen Grasp of the Obvious award for that one.

But—but—this totally blows away the “European colonialism” argument! Genetic proof that Jews were from the land of Israel, and the man behind the science. (Of course, he’s a Jew.)

But the Gazans are living in crushing misery: The New York Times is calling Rafah a “shopping mecca,” even as Richard Goldstone, HRW, and the EU and UN insist that Gazans are starving, miserable, and oppressed. Cognitive dissonance? No. The narrative.

It’s on. It’s off. It’s on. It’s off. No, it’s Iran. Yesterday, the news was full of the Iranians accepting the draft agreement to let us enrich their nuclear fuel for them. Today, Iran did their usual thing and said, “What? We never said we’d accept that.” If Iran was a child, I’d put it in permanent time-out.

“It is easier to dismantle the Palestinian Authority than it is to dismantle us, and we will take them apart before anyone thinks of touching us.”

Ah, the Hamas/Fatah truce. The snark simply writes itself.

Turkey, the friend of Jews—not. France’s Le Monde polled the Turks, and 53% say they would not want to live next door to a Jew. But really, the Turks luuurve Israelis. Truly. They do. Probably a little more than they love Armenians, but I wouldn’t want to lay odds on that.

Abdullah to Obama: Forget Iran, it’s not that important. Uh-huh. We shouldn’t concentrate on Iran, because the king of Jordan is tired of hearing about Iran, Iran, Iran. It’s the Palestinians that are the key to mideast peace, you see—not the country that’s trying to build nuclear weapons, murdering American soldiers in Iraq and Afghanistan, funding terrorists in Israel, South America, and, well, all over the world, and oh yeah—violently repressig its own people. So yeah, really, Obama—what’s with the Iran obsession?

Bill Maher is a great big idiot: Want to laugh? Watch this video over at Hot Air, where Bill Maher, the world-renowned scientist, tells us how dangerous flu vaccinations are, and vaccinations in general. Biggest laugh-line: It’s not settled science, like global warming. Yes, he really says that. Like Allahpundit says, when Chris Matthews is your voice of reason—well.

Hezbollah: That was no missile, that was a door! I really want to see their video footage. They’re claiming that the group of Hezbollah terrorists seen loading a long, metallic object onto a truck were carrying a metal door. Uh-huh. I’m also eagerly awaiting UNIFIL’s explanation as to why their men were watching Hezbollah load a “metal door” onto a pickup truck. What? UN peacekeepers ignoring Hezbollah UN Resolution violations? No! You don’t say!

Khameini in a coma? Or dead? I hope it’s true. But if it is, well, Iran ain’t seen nothin’ yet. Revolution? That won’t be the half of it. It might be great news to Israel, depending on who wins the power struggle. We can always dream that client states Syria and Lebanon get left out in the cold.

Those wily Jews: While the Arabs and Muslims in the region continue their important work in improving the many ways you can carry a suicide bomb, Israelis are developing things like a battery that will last thousands of hours in hearing aids and the like. Oh, and the battery will be cheaper and cleaner than those currently on the market. No wonder Israel has more Nobel prizes than the entire Arab world combined.

Dear suckers esteemed inspectors of the IAEA,

Like, we forgot to tell you something on your last visit here. Remember when you asked us if we had anything more to declare, and, we were like, “No way!” and you were like, “Way!” and we were like, “Dudes, no way, and if you don’t stop messin’ with us we’re gonna call the Basij dudes on their bikes and they’re really pissed today ’cause all the hot protest babes are on the other side,” and you were like, “Whoa, Basij, not necessary, bro,” and then you, like, ran to the airport and forgot to give us going-away presents?

Well, like, we kinda forgot to tell you that, uh, yeah, there’s this one more little nuke plant, and it’s, like, near Qom, and it’s like, about a year away from being able to make a bomb, uh, I mean, to power up the holy dudes’ mosques so they can get their mad on at the Zionist Entity every Friday like always. Oh, wait—my buddy Mahmoud just told me to tell you to tell them that it’s just a pilot enrichment program, and it’s barely big enough to make a single—uh, pilot. And anyway, like, we’re only going to enrich it to five percent, and everyone knows that you need to enrich it more to make bombs, and the Islamic Republic of Iran is peaceful, and we don’t want to hurt anyone, except for all you infidels and Zionists and idolators and atheists. And dogs. We really hate dogs, dude.

So, like, this is to let you know that we, like, uh, forgot to tell you—oh, wait, I already said that. Dude. Um, okay, well, then, that’s about it, except, like, death to America and death to Israel, dudes. And we hope you’re not mad that we, like, forgot.

InSincerely,

The dudes in Iran who are going to nuke your asses, uh, I mean, be your best friends.

No room at the inn for Mad Mahmoud: Awesome. Another New York hotel canceled the banquet after finding out it was for the proud Holocaust denier. Unfortunately, he still spoke to a mostly full house at the UN.

UNRWA: We want money. That’s what we want. UNRWA is begging for more money to keep the victim class of the Palestinians going into the next generation, because hey, 61 years isn’t nearly long enough to keep paying “refugees.” Why, the UN has also been paying the millions of descendants of Jewish refugees from Arab lands, too. Oh, wait. No they’re not.

AP still doesn’t get the significance of the last name: Leonard Cohen performed in Israel, and I have to laugh at the AP headline and angle of the story: “Leonard Cohen performs in Israel, defies boycott.” Really. Just look at the last name one more time, AP. Or listen to Hallelujah again.

Well, I feel safer now: The One has chaired the UN Security Council, and got it to pass a resolution calling for an end to nuclear weapons. The next agenda calls for kittens, butterflies, and unicorns for everyone. Winged unicorns for seven-year-old girls. What Obama did not do, however, was get a resolution calling for sanctions on Iran, which is trying to build a nuclear bomb. So once again, it’s all for show.

“There are a group of the world’s Jews who had a major influence in the elections who were a serious threat to Egypt taking this position,” he said.

The Arab media, of course, carries the party line, and blames Jews and “the Zionist media” for the failure of their candidate.

Exhibit B: The Supreme Leader of Iran calls Israel “the deadly cancer of Zionism” while his hand-picked president denies the Holocaust and then tells the world he is proud of his Holocaust denial. He repeated the same filthy Jewish conspiracy accusations he raised last year in this year’s speech, and although this year a few Western nations walked out, Sweden (among others) felt that the following was not enough Jew-hatred to make their delegates leave:

The dignity, integrity and rights of the American and European people are being played with by a small but deceitful number of people called Zionists. Although they are a miniscule minority, they have been dominating an important portion of the financial and monetary centers as well as the political decision-making centers of some European countries and the US in a deceitful, complex and furtive manner. It is deeply disastrous to witness that some presidential or premiere nominees in some big countries have to visit these people, take part in their gatherings, swear their allegiance and commitment to their interests in order to attain financial or media support.

This means that the great people of America and various nations of Europe need to obey the demands and wishes of a small number of acquisitive and invasive people. These nations are spending their dignity and resources on the crimes and occupations and the threats of the Zionist network against their will.

The Swedish government also cleared the Aftonbladet of anti-Semitism over their lie-filled article about the IDF killing palestinians for their organs.

Neither am I surprised that the only place you can find the above lines is in articles with the full text of the speech. The media ignored Ahmadinejad’s anti-Semitism last year as well.

Exhibit C: Spain disqualified an Israeli college team from an international solar power contest, not because the team broke the rules—but because the college is located in the West Bank. Apparently, global warming is an urgent cause, but the Palestinian cause is more important than even saving the earth from itself. (No, I don’t believe global warming is happening. But these people do. The Exception Clause reigns.) And of course, we heard only a few days ago that anti-Semitism in Spain is on the rise.

What do all these things have in common? They are claimed to be anti-Zionism. And yet, they resemble nothing so much as anti-Semitism.

You can put a wig and a fancy ball-gown on a pig, add earings and make-up, and yet, in the end, you still have a pig.

Yes, it’s anti-Semitism. Let’s stop pretending that it’s not.

Sucks to be you, Part 1: The anti-Israel (some might say “anti-Semitic” Egyptian minister of culture lost his bid to become the director of UNESCO. Gee, guess building those synagogues for the six Jews left in Egypt just didn’t convince the west that he’s changed. Or maybe it’s just the year of the woman—a Bulgarian woman won the job. I will point out that Israel did not oppose the Egyptian’s election, at least, not publicly. It was a private election. I’m guessing they didn’t vote for the bastard who said that he only wanted Israeli books burned that “insult Islam.” Oh, that makes it all better, then.

Sucks to be you, Part 2: What’s a dictator to do? First, the Helmsley Hotel chain cancels Mad Mahmoud’s banquet reservations and tells him he’s not welcome in any of their hotels. Then the Libyan mass-murderer-slash-dictator finds himself barred from most hotels in the city (on top of being banned in NJ, and yay, Garden State!). So he’s decided to sleep at the Libyan embassy. And Mad Mahmoud is going to be staying at the Essex House—unless the protests get too overwhelming for the hotel.

Sucks to be you, Part 3: Lowered expectations you said, lowered expectations you got! Obama told Israel that it needed to make “important steps to restrain settlement activity.” I do believe that goes into Netanyahu’s column as a “win.” Poor, poor Stephen Walt. He must be so disappointed today. Then again, he can use this as more proof of that invincible Israel Lobby in his next book. And I’m thinking that Barack Obama’s having a very, very bad day today overall. Not that I think that’s a good thing, because his screwing up international relations is a very bad thing for America. Maybe he’ll use this as a teachable moment, and learn from it.

Naaaaaaaah. Just kidding.

President Shimon Peres told schoolchildren in the north that “the prime minister will be demonstratively absent from a meeting with one of the most evil and horrible people of modern history, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, who lies through his teeth about the existence of the Holocaust and curses Israel”.

It’s not quite juvenile scorn, but it’s close enough.