You might remember, a few weeks ago there was news about the “Real Genius” weapon. Well now different scientific news recalls another movie.

CERN - the Conseil Européenne pour la Recherche Nucleaire – the same organization where the World Wide Web was born, is about to start testing the Large Hadron Collider in an effort to recreate conditions after the Big Bang.

However there are those who fear that the experiment could destroy the world and have filed lawsuits to prevent the activation of the device.

The device is designed to replicate conditions that existed just a fraction of a second after the Big Bang, and its creators hope it will unlock the secrets of how the universe began.

However, opponents fear the machine, which will smash pieces of atoms together at high speed and generate temperatures of more than a trillion degrees centigrade, may create a mini-black hole that could tear the earth apart.

Does this remind anyone of this dialogue from Ghostbusters?

Dr. Egon Spengler: There’s something very important I forgot to tell you.
Dr. Peter Venkman: What?
Dr. Egon Spengler: Don’t cross the streams.
Dr. Peter Venkman: Why?
Dr. Egon Spengler: It would be bad.
Dr. Peter Venkman: I’m fuzzy on the whole good/bad thing. What do you mean, “bad”?
Dr. Egon Spengler: Try to imagine all life as you know it stopping instantaneously and every molecule in your body exploding at the speed of light.

So if you’re reading this next week, the experiment has been so far successful. But if not, apparently the black holes were a bigger problem than the researchers anticipated, but at least we were first with the news.

h/t Secular Blasphemy, who lives in Norway, which is a lot closer to the collider, so if there are any problems maybe he could send out a warning e-mail.

UPDATE via Instapundit: An item about debunking the doomsday scenarios.

Several rounds of scientific studies, considering increasingly outlandish scenarios, have ruled out the black-hole threat. The evidence shows that the collider is absolutely safe, and poses no chance of cosmic catastrophe. Nevertheless, the hysteria continues: Part of the reason for that is that scientists say it’s conceivable that a less threatening breed of subatomic black holes could be created. But another factor is that there’s so much science-fiction appeal to the tale of the black hole that ate the earth.

But this is also fascinating:

Speaking of time travel, Cramer has been in the midst of a real-life experiment in retrocausality - a kind of backward flow of information from the future to the past. I first wrote about this experiment almost two years ago, and Cramer recently told me that he’s still trying to get the apparatus to work. Perhaps what Stephen Hawking said is true: Nature abhors a time machine.

And if Cramer’s successful he’ll write an article about it last week!

Crossposted on Soccer Dad.

Busy working when I wasn’t recovering from a stomach bug. But I found this on Hot Air:

Effing hilarious, even if you haven’t seen the movie.

The Hulk is guest-blogging here again:

Hulk go to new Hulk movie. Hulk was hoping it better than stupid movie girl took Hulk to last time. Stupid movie had giant dogs. Hulk in movie smash giant dogs, but that just stupid. Hulk like dogs. Hulk not want to smash dogs. New Hulk movie was better. No giant dogs!

Betty in this movie not boring, girl says. Girl says this movie Betty play same role every single movie she in. Hulk not know what “role” means. Girl says movie Betty just has to look pretty and be love interest. Oh. Hulk get that. Movie Betty good at that. But movie Betty not as pretty as real Betty.

Hulk like this movie. Lots more fighting. Hulk wins every fight. Hulk always wins fights. Hulk is the strongest one there is. Movie Hulk fought big ugly monster. Hulk can’t say monster name. Girl say it for me. Girl will speak now.

It’s the Abomination, Hulk.

That stupid name.

Well, uh, yeah. But I didn’t make it up.

Hulk will call him Ugly Monster. What girl think?

I think that’s a great name, Hulk.

Girl always agree with Hulk. Girl smart.

Hell, yeah!

Hulk fought army men, too. Why do soldiers always fight with Hulk? Hulk not bother soldiers. But soldiers always follow Hulk, always try to hurt him. Movie Hulk same as real Hulk. Movie Hulk smash soldiers.

Actually, Hulk, I think they broke the Hulk Smash rule in this one. The movie Hulk killed a bunch of people. Comic book Hulk never does.

That right. Hulk not kill soldiers, even though soldiers always try to hurt Hulk! Hulk just smash soldiers! Where soldiers? Hulk will smash them!

They’re just movie soldiers, Hulk. No soldiers here. No! Wait! Not the door again!

Crap. Now I have to get a new door. Again.

Well, this Hulk movie was excellent. They didn’t waste the first 45 minutes trying to give you Hulk’s raison d’smash. There’s a three-minute backstory while the credits roll, and then you’re in the movie. I liked Ed Norton as Bruce Banner. I liked William Hurt as Thunderbolt Ross. And Liv Tyler was a great Betty. All she really had to do was look lovingly at Bruce/The Hulk, and she’s got that down to a science now. And best of all: No giant mutant poodles. Just the Abomination, with a slightly different origin, but hey, it worked for me.

A few chuckles, but overall, don’t go into the Hulk expecting the same experience as Iron Man. Iron Man was funny. Hulk is dark, which it rather has to be. The only disturbing part, for me, was breaking the Hulk-never-kills-anyone rule. I know it defies logic that the Hulk never kills anyone, but hey, he’s a comic book character. We get to bend the rules for comic books. (That’s how the Jack Kirby Hulk can grab a chunk of asphalt and make it go up and down in waves like a carpet, instead of just breaking off in his hands, as it would do in reality.)

And yes, we do see a return of the purple pants.

Best news is the cameo at the end of the film. The Avengers movie can’t be very far behind. And word is the next Hulk villain will be: The Leader. Woo-hoo!

No, the best news is the box office estimate: Looking good. $21 million on Friday night.

This is a great summer for comic book movies.

If you have not yet seen Iron Man, go. Sarah and I went last night, and we thoroughly enjoyed the film. It was also great to be in a half-empty theater with choice of seats. And a definitively metal soundtrack… totally fitting, but I thought they should at least have had the lyrics during the end credits.

This one’s a keeper. I may even buy it on Blu-Ray and I don’t even have a Blu-Ray player.

Looking forward to the new Hulk movie next month, too. I’m taking two of my first-year students, who I took to see the X-Men film six years ago. I suspect that they won’t have to peek through their fingers during the really violent parts this time, though. They’re fifteen by now.

Marvel characters really do seem to get the better movies. The only DC movies that have been truly great are the first two Christopher Reeve Superman movies and Batman Begins.

I really like that we have movie producers, writers, and directors who have grown up reading comic books. It makes the difference between a great comic book movie, and a piece of crap like the 1980s Swamp Thing. Ew. Now a Swamp Thing movie that was faithful to the Alan Moore series…. brrr. That’d be scary. I probably wouldn’t watch it. The comic books used to freak me out to the point that I wouldn’t read them at night. It’s not that I’m a chicken. It’s that I get really involved in whatever I am reading or watching. I have a hard time remembering it isn’t real. That’s why I can’t watch horror films. That, and the fact that they give me nightmares.

Anyway. Go see Iron Man. It rocks.

Charlton Heston is gone. The article didn’t mention cause of death. I have my suspicions that it was a deliberate early exit due to Alzheimer’s, and if so, more power to him. Alzheimer’s a horrible way to die.

But while we’re talking about Heston, what’s your favorite line of his? Or your favorite film?

My all-time favorite is “Get your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty apes!” from, of course, The Planet of the Apes (the good version).

Yours?

What did the Spanish diplomat, Eduardo Propper de Callejon have in common with Raoul Wallenberg, Frank Foley and Aristades De Sousa Mendes? Like the others, Propper de Callejon risked his life and career to issue visas to Jews to escape the Nazis.

As German troops marched into France in the summer of 1940, Propper de Callejon, then first secretary in the Spanish Embassy in Paris, stamped and signed passports for four days nearly nonstop to allow refugees to escape to Spain, and from there to the relative safety of Portugal.Propper de Callejon, a Franco loyalist, defied Spanish Foreign Ministry instructions not to issue such visas. In 1941, he was demoted, and never promoted to be an ambassador. He retired in 1965 and died in 1972. The exact number of visas Propper de Callejon issued remains unknown, but Yad Vashem Director Avner Shalev said it was believed to be at least 1,500, both Jewish and non-Jewish. ”He was signing papers with both his hands. He signed so many that his hands hurt so much, my mother had to bandage them at the end of the day,” said Elena Bonham Carter, his daughter. ”It was extraordinary. He said those were the most important days of his life.”

Like De Sousa Mendes he paid for his heroism with his career.

Wallenberg came from one of the wealthiest families in Sweden. (And it’s still quite wealthy.) Propper de Callejon, though, also has a famous relative, his granddaughter.

Israel’s Holocaust memorial on Wednesday posthumously recognized a prominent Spanish diplomat, who was actress Helena Bonham Carter’s grandfather, for his role in saving hundreds of Jews during World War II.

(Yes, her name differs from that of her mother by one letter.)Not entirely related, you might remember that two other Harry Potter cast members have contributed to a Holocaust memorial event.

Crossposted on Soccer Dad.

If you’re really geeky, all episodes of the original Star Trek series are available for download at CBS. (h/t Crossing the Rubicon3)BTW, why is this on CBS and not NBC, as you might recall.

Mr. Spock: Here is the readout, Captain. The computer has identified the alien vessel as a 1968 Chrysler Imperial with a tinted windshield and retractable headlights.Captain Kirk: And the little blue and orange numbers?

Mr. Spock: That’s called a “California license plate”, and it’s registered, or was in 1968, to a corporation known as “NBC”. Wait.. there’s something more.. The computer isn’t sure, but it thinks this NBC used to manufacture cookies.

So my best guess is that CBS has a hand in the producing the upcoming Star Trek movie so it’s hoping that making the original show available will generate interest in the movie. (Though CBS and Viacom have split there’s still a production company called CBS Paramount.)

(The main post is about the Church of Spock, which Daled Amos figures is one of the more mainstream tourist sites in Lynchburg.)

If you’re super geeky here are Star Charts of the whole Trek Universe. So if you want to trek through the Romulan Empire or vacation on Bajor, here’s all the info you need. (h/t Colossus of Rhodey)

Crossposted on Soccer Dad.

Go see it.

Really. There isn’t much more to say. It was funny, it was sweet, it has a fantastic cast, and the kid that plays Juno is simply amazing. It gets a 94% rating on Rotten Tomatoes. It deserves 100%.

Really, really good.

I saw Sweeney Todd this afternoon, in a theater that had a decent-sized crowd. I can see why Steven Sondheim gave the movie his blessings. It’s quite good. It has its flaws, but overall, I enjoyed it immensely.

Flaw number one is that Helena Bonham Carter is a great actor, but she can’t sing for squat. Tim Burton really needed to give the role of Mrs. Lovett to someone who can actually sing. Johnny Depp isn’t a great singer, but his voice was good enough for the film.

Flaw number two was that I was immensely peeved that the introduction and finale were both skipped. The film ended too abruptly, and I really, really missed the finale.

Other minor quibbles: I thought most of the songs were sung too slowly. The comedic songs, especially, weren’t as quick and funny as they could have been. And Helena Bonham Carter either doesn’t do comedy well, or didn’t get that Mrs. Lovett wasn’t a dark, tired, sad woman all the time. I guess I really can’t compare her to the Angela Lansbury version, since Angela won the Tony for her role. But she could have been a little funnier.

Really, though, I did like the film. I’ll probably see it again, or maybe even buy it, spurting blood from throats and all. Tim Burton might not have wanted to make it so bloody, though. I’ll bet a PG would have gotten him legions of Johnny Depp tween fans. It’s rated R. Sorena couldn’t get in to get us seats early; she had to come get me to get her past the ticket-taker.

Overall, today was a very good day. And I got some cash in the karma bank because we discovered someone had left his keys hanging out of the door of his Toyota convertible, so I left a note on the windshield and the keys at the box office. I imagine someone got a nice little present when they got out of their movie.

Just breaking …

Christopher Pine has been cast to play the young Captain Kirk in the next Star Trek movie.

The bridge of the starship Enterprise is filling up.

Chris Pine, who had been in talks to join the cast of J.J. Abrams’ “Star Trek” flick, will play the young James Kirk, while Karl Urban will take on the role of Dr. Leonard McCoy, distributor Paramount confirmed Thursday.They join previously announced cast members Zachary Quinto as Vulcan scientist Spock, Simon Pegg as engineer Scotty, John Cho as helmsman Sulu, Zoe Saldana as communications officer Uhura and Anton Yelchin as navigator Chekov.

Leonard Nimoy, who played Enterprise science officer Spock in the 1960s TV series and six “Star Trek” feature films, also will appear as an older version of the Vulcan.

Eric Bana, the star of Steven Spielberg’s “Munich” and Ang Lee’s “Hulk,” is playing a villain in the “Trek” film, which begins shooting in November and is due out in December 2008.

They couldn’t find someone named Christopher Pike?

UPDATE: It occurred to me that if Nimoy will be playing an older Spock, the story will likely be told as a flashback. So in the framing story will Spock have returned to the Federation or will he still be, where we last saw him, fomenting revolution on Romulus?

UPDATE: I know nothing of these actors, but someone isn’t happy with the choices. (h/t Transterrestial Musings)

Crossposted on Soccer Dad.

I went up to the office yesterday and had a couple of meetings, then got to actually work in an office instead of from my home, which felt very work-like. Seriously. I do the exact same work at home, yet it feels far more official when I’m doing it in an office. I wonder if that’s really why they make most of us work in an office.

Anyway, things are proceeding nicely via the job, and if all goes well, I should be an on-staff employee, working from home four days a week, and traveling to NorVA once a week. We’re trying to pick a day.

This morning I am the guest of Janet and Chris, who have four cats, three of which are on hand most of the time. The fourth is a bit shy.

We watched Babylon 5: The Lost Tales last night.

Wow, did it suck.

A full review will have to wait, but there was a first-season episode of the Gilmore Girls where Lorelai and Rory were making fun of Father Knows Best, and the conversation went something like, “Do you remember the episode where Buddy lost his homework and nothing happened?” “Or how about the one where the dad came home late from work and nothing happened?”

Last night, Janet kept asking “When is the story going to start?”

That was because nothing happened.

I’m taking it off my wishlist. If you were thinking of buying it, I wouldn’t. The only good thing about the show was seeing the Bruce Boxleitner still looks great. Except he should dye his hair. He’s aging better than Tracy Scoggins, who reminded me how much I disliked season five.

There’s a reason this thing went straight to DVD, and it’s not because it’s good.

For me it started with the article by Debbie Schlussel in the FrontPage magazine. Let’s not mince the words - the article is a hatchet job, and a very thorough one to boot. Debbie has definitely gone overboard, trying to judge the movie as if it were financed by the Israeli Tourism ministry and should have been focused solely on the Jewish motives. That bit of criticism really cracked me up:

And don’t forget Wall Street Journal reporter Steve Levine, played by Gary Wilmes, the most stereotypically Jewish-looking actor they could cast - a living embodiment of the angst-ridden, sweaty big-nosed, glasses-wearing Jew you’d find in “The Protocols of the Elders of Zion” picture book for kids.

I have even taken the trouble to look up the poor guy’s picture. I am not sure that Gary Wilmes is that living embodiment mentioned above, but it is clear that he will have to consider an investment in some major plastic surgery now.

But after looking up some stuff on Debbie’s site, I think I have caught the drift. It seems that Debbie is sometimes slightly overexcited (all for the good cause, no doubt), like in this case, for instance:

Then, there is this BS:

In Palestine, Jewish terrorist attacks finally persuaded the British to pull out.

WRONG again. The Brits pulled out, if anything, because they were tired of Islamic/Arab violence (there was no Jewish violence against the Brits) against British soldiers, and because eventually the land was carved up into Israel, Jordan, etc.

Ah well, as I said, it is all for the good cause, and anyway history these days is a flexible science…

But… Saying all this, there is more to Debbie’s article than meets the eye. Of course, there is no place to criticize Winterbottom, Julie and Pitt for focusing on Mariane Pearl and the chief of Pakistan’s counterterrorism unit. After all, it is their movie and their license.

But blaming the barbaric execution of Daniel Pearl on the misdeeds of US in Guantanamo is pure unadulterated bullshit. The list of kidnappers/murderers demands includes the one re Gitmo prisoners indeed, but read it in its entirety:

We still demand the following:

• The immediate release of U.S. held prisoners in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba.
• The return of Pakistani prisoners to Pakistan.
• The immediate end of U.S. presence in Pakistan.
• The delivery of F-16 planes that Pakistan had paid for and never received.

We assure Americans that they shall never be safe on the Muslim Land of Pakistan.
And if our demands are not met this scene shall be repeated again and again…

It is quite clear that the absurd list was never intended as a base for negotiations and that its sole purpose was to increase the publicity for the planned act of murder. The fact that Winterbottom, Julie and Pitt made Gitmo a focal point of the movie is telling.

Another salient point in the article - disregard of the fact that Daniel Pearl is Jewish. As noticed here:

…something could have been inserted about Daniel Pearl, a man from a family with deep Israeli roots — scenes and sentiments that would make him a real person who once lived, loved, and later died a horrible death, publicly.

It is not certain that Daniel’s fate was sealed by the fact of his Jewishness, but it is certain that the fact did not escape the attention of his murderers and they obviously enjoyed it. The title of the execution clip - “The Slaughter of the Spy-Journalist, the Jew Daniel Pearl” is sufficient testimony.

The royal pair of Hollywood is definitely way above their heads into politics. Not that it makes them outstanding, many other Hollywood stars and mega-stars have discovered the politicking as a new and glamorous pastime. But the mix of the mega-star popularity, naivety, good will and ability to dumb down any complex issue to a set of childish slogans has a definite impact on general population. Here is one example of a rave review by a groupie:

…without apology, it is simultaneously an unabashedly political vehicle that does not fall victim to sloganeering or jingoism, as well as an effective and gripping re-telling of a story that is still fresh in the minds of the audience. I know a lot of people are criticizing the movie.. but the best thing about this movie was it does not points finger on anyone.

Yep. An unabashedly political vehicle that does not “points finger on anyone”, indeed…

But the best expression of the above mentioned Hollywood mix is provided by the royal pair:

The hero of this movie is a Muslim Pakistani Captain . . . . Muslim, Christian, Buddhist, Jewish–they all came together, all of them becoming great friends.

Why, indeed, can’t we all get along and be friends? I really don’t know. Maybe because there are too many gently smiling folks like this one:

I really recommend this clip as a mandatory viewing. Notice that the person that appears in it is an American resident and knows his rights exceedingly well. It is also worth your while to visit his site at _http://www.al-buruj.com/_ to get an in-depth understanding of the creature. And the ideology that moves him and his ilk, making it kinda difficult to make friends with him.

But don’t tell Brangelina about it - it may distress them, possibly on a shooting day, and then the damage to the world will be immeasurable …

Hat tip to Bagel Blogger.

Cross-posted on SimplyJews.

I went to see Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix with my niece and her mom tonight, as Sorena is going to Interlochen this weekend for three weeks, and wasn’t sure if she’d be able to see it in camp. (And by the way, Sorena is one of only three people her age in the Richmond Youth Symphony Orchestra, if I may brag a bit more.)

Go see it.

Really good.

Best of the bunch.

The duel at the end was superb. That Dumbledore—he has presence.

Next Friday night, Sarah and I are taking her eldest sons to the local Barnes & Noble’s to get the seventh book. I took Sorena two years ago. (Was it only two years? Wow. She sure has grown.) She had fun. I did, too.

Did anyone else see the Darren Aronofsky film The Fountain?

Yeah?

Did you get it?

Me neither.

On the other hand, I’m going to buy another Clint Mansell soundtrack. Damn, he’s good.

Why is it that every time I hear the name “The Red Mosque” (for that jihadi mosque in Pakistan) all I can really think of is “The Mosque of the Red Death?”

They never should have shown us that movie in junior high. Brrr. Vincent Price was the bogeyman of my youth. Between that, “The Last Man on Earth,” and “The Fly,” he haunted my childhood dreams.

But back to The Mosque of the Red Death: Yeah. It is.

I wonder what the tally of women and children will be by the time this ends.

There’s a new Bruce Banner in town, and now there’s a new Betty Ross.

The new Banner is Ed Norton, whose name I can never hear without thinking of The Honeymooners. Sorry. I just can’t. And the new Betty is familiar to us all: It’s Liv Tyler. (And may I say: Yay. Jennifer Connelly may have talent, but you never would have guessed it had you only seen her in The Hulk.)

Fanboy-friendly Liv Tyler has been signed to play opposite Edward Norton (and a whole lot of CGI) in Louis Leterrier’s “The Incredible Hulk,” which promises a lot more action than the previous entry — and a lot less poodles.

Souces indicate that Bruce Banner and Betty Ross will be sort of estranged at the beginning of the movie, but get back together when all the chases and explosions and giant green transformations become a factor.

Of course, I could not present this without asking a special guest poster, who, ah, told me what to write. (If you’ve never read his review of the Hulk movie, it’s here.)

‘Bout time Hulk got new movie. Stupid orange rock-man have new moving coming out. Hulk beat stupid Thing lots of times. Um, Hulk try to count: One time. One more time. One more time. See? Lots of times. Hulk always beat Rock-man. Hulk is the strongest one there is! Puny humans should make movie about Hulk beating up Thing! Hulk would like to see that! Girl says she would, too.

Hulk does not care about puny Banner. Hulk better have more time in movie than last time. Stupid Banner. Banner is boring. Hulk want to see Hulk on screen. And pretty Betty. But not boring one. Last Betty boring. Girl says new Betty will not be boring. Girl better be right, or Hulk sit on sofa again. Break door, too.

Took the afternoon off to go see Spider-Man 3. No spoilers will be included with this post.

I liked it, but there were some plot twists I didn’t care for, and totally didn’t expect. Didn’t much like the ending.

On the other hand, the CGI has finally caught up to Spidey. It was really, really good in this film. One reason I haven’t bought the Spidey films is because the CGI sucks. It isn’t that you just always know it’s CGI—it’s that it looks like a computer game in the middle of a movie. Not this time. The Venom and Sandman effects were amazing.

Bruce Campbell plays a small, but very funny part. I miss Bruce Campbell. He needs a new TV series. So does Ted Raimi.

They showed seven commercials and five movie previews, taking a total of 15 minutes. I so should have tried to make the 1:30 screening. I wouldn’t have missed a thing but the commercials. Think I’ll start working that into my movie timetables.

One of the previews was the international trailer for the next Harry Potter film. They really make it look great. That’s another one I’m looking forward to. The summer movie season is here, finally. A big fat “Yay!’ from me.

I tend to rent most of my movies these days, but I’ll pay to see the big action flicks in a theater.

I am, frankly, on the side of the HD-DVD consortium on this. I am a firm believer in copyright protection and have refused numerous times to accept illegal copies of expensive software. Yeah, I’d like to have the software. But I grew up a while back, and realized that it’s wrong to steal. There’s a big difference between fair use (for example, using music clips in my podcast) and outright theft.

Michael Malone has a great article on the Diggers trying to subvert copyright law.

But the biggest problem with Digg is not the business itself, which is an impressive creation, but its community. One of the things we’re learning about the Web 2.0 world is that all communities aren’t alike; when you let millions of anonymous users design your product, you also let them determine your fate. And Digg has put itself in the hands of an army of postadolescents with too much education and too much free time, the age cohort that gets its news from “The Colbert Report” and holds the anarchistic view that all information should be, in fact, “wants to be,” free.

Nothing wrong with that. Indeed, been there, done that. But now, in my gray-haired middle-age I’ve come to realize that if you are going to create a venue for children to play, someone has to be the grown-up. And that is where Digg blew it.

[...] In other words, Digg was willing to block porn and hate sites, but was perfectly willing to violate trade secrets if its users said so.

It was a breathtaking abrogation of responsibility by a person in a position of authority. If you sign up to be sheriff, and are rewarded handsomely for doing so, then your job when the howling mob shows up outside the jail is defend the prisoner under attack, even if you despise him. At the very least, you run away and accept the shame of your cowardice. But the one thing you don’t ever do is join the mob knocking down the jailhouse door.

And that is exactly what Kevin Rose did. Rather than maturely endure the momentary anger of his community, he instead caved in the most craven manner possible. With a certain justice, all that this gutless move managed to do was earn Rose even more contempt for being two-faced and spineless.

Read it all.

Update: Background on the Digg revolution that the article above misses.

While it’s obvious why the creator of a movie or a song might deserve some special claim over the use of their creation, it’s hard to see why anyone should be able to pick a number at random and unilaterally declare ownership of it. There is nothing creative about this number — indeed, it was chosen by a method designed to ensure that the resulting number was in no way special. It’s just a number they picked out of a hat. And now they own it?

As if that’s not weird enough, there are actually millions of other numbers (other keys used in AACS) that AACS LA claims to own, and we don’t know what they are. When I wrote the thirty-digit number that appears above, I carefully avoided writing the real 09F9 number, so as to avoid the possibility of mind-bending lawsuits over integer ownership. But there is still a nonzero probability that AACS LA thinks it owns the number I wrote.

One of the things I like so much about the new Heroes TV show is that the writers are constantly surprising me. But they’re doing it in the right way, not the cheap way that Lost keeps pulling—by leading you in one direction and deliberately messing with your mind once you’ve figured out where the writers are going. Heroes is simply peeling away the layers and making its heroes and villains multidimensional, which makes them hard to predict, which keeps the show interesting. And that is something I absolutely prefer in my TV shows: If they’re not interesting, I stop watching. Predictable? Yawn.

The thing is, I also have the kind of mind that tends to spoil surprises. Only once in my life have my friends successfully thrown me a surprise party, and that’s because I’d convinced myself that it was going to be at my brother’s house the next day, not at my friend’s house that night. Every other one I’ve managed to walk in on early or figure out was being thrown for me. That goes for major movie plotlines, too, for the most part. The Sixth Sense? I had it long before the end. Picked up on it during the scenes with Bruce Willis’ wife in the restaurant.

So tonight, I was watching The Prestige, and about 40 minutes into it was debating whether I wanted to keep watching, because it seemed to be turning into an ugly little film about a vengeance fight between two men who, even though being played by Hugh Jackman and Christian Bale, had little to appeal to me. But I stuck with it, and then the plot started to pull me into it, and then it just grabbed me by the throat and wouldn’t let me go. And the ending—well, that one was the biggest mindf*ck ending I’ve seen since the Sixth Sense. I figured out one part of the twist, and I thought I had the other part figured out. But then it turned out there were twists within twists within twists, and at the final scene, I just said, “Oh my God!” and sat there, slack-jawed, as the credits rolled.

It’s the kind of film that needs digesting before you can recommend it to a friend, but then, a film that makes you think about it like that is generally the kind of film you’d recommend to a friend.

I think I may have to start reading some Christopher Priest novels. Damn, that movie was good.

If only I could tell you the emails that have been zinging back and forth between Omri and me, but then, it’s so much more fun to just have an all-out blogwar.

Okay, bub. Here’s the thing. I never saw Saving Private Ryan. I have yet to see a single mob movie since the Godfather films. I took a pass on Wheels of Death, or whatever the name of the drunk-driving film was they tried to make us watch in high school. I turn off nature shows just before the orca is about to grab the penguin/sea lion/surfer dude who got in the way.

If you tell me a film is really, brutally, violent, I will tell you “Pass.” I don’t care if my going to the film is going to be the sole reason that Western Civilization survives—before I go, you are going to have to prove that to me beyond the shadow of a doubt, plus, swear that it’s okay for me to close my eyes and plug my ears and sing “I can’t HEAR you” during the really disgusting parts, plus you have to be sitting there with me and telling me when the really disgusting parts come up. Oh, and you buy the popcorn.

The fact that I can appreciate Dr. Ruth more because she was a sniper in the Israeli War of Independence has absolutely no bearing on my dislike of filmed violence. (Of course, this would have been a much funnier incident had you not remembered that I posted on her last summer, because then I would have sent you the link and yet another email zing).

And I should point out to you that I have absolutely no objection whatsoever to real, actual violence being used in self-defense, and have done violence to people who tried to do violence to me. And that included boys who picked on me (or my brothers) when I was a kid, six-three, 200-lb. guys who went after my brother when we were both in college (okay, I didn’t have to hit him, but I was across the room the second he poked my brother in the shoulder, and if our friend Ken hadn’t stopped him, I would have helped Dave beat him up), and, well, anyone who comes after me and mine. I am irrational that way. Before the thought “But gee, he’s six-three and weighs more than two of you” hits my head, I’m already in his face telling him to leave my brother alone.

So unless you or Frank Miller personally pick a fight with my brother to get me to watch this movie, I’m probably not going to see 300.

I think Western Civilization will survive.

When the New York Times leads with this in the film review, I think that, added to the “this movie has really graphic violence” meme going around, will lead me to pass.

“300” is about as violent as “Apocalypto” and twice as stupid.

And while we’re talking about comics, Marvel killed off Captain America, who apparently was a victim of 9/11, or something like that. I don’t really know. I read about it, got annoyed, then remembered I never really read Cap, shrugged, and moved on with my life.

It’s not like they’re not going to bring him back in a few years anyway. Nobody’s ever really dead in comic books or soap operas.

So I was reading something on TNR, and there was an ad on top for a film with the guy who played Reed Richards in Fantastic Four, and he was all dressed up in 19th century (or 18th century) English garb, so I clicked on it, having both a soft spot for period pieces and extremely handsome men with gorgeous cheekbones.

And I found this. It’s a movie about the man who ended the English slave trade, and looks, well, phenomenal. Just put it on my must-see list.

I have no interest whatsoever in the origin of the song, which is apparently also part of the film.

Don’t expect much from the website. It doesn’t seem to be working properly once you get off the main page. But the trailer is, well, amazing.

Daniel Radcliffe, the boy who acted (Harry Potter, of course), is starring in a revival of Equus in London. The play, some may recall, requires nudity, and is about a boy with an unhealthy obsession with horses. Some Harry Potter parents are objecting to pictures like these. (The link leads to semi-naked pictures of Daniel Radcliffe. You are warned.)

I think those parents who insist that Radcliffe is a role model are in dire need of an injection of common sense. Radcliffe is an actor. Actors play roles. If he wants to ever shed the Harry Potter role, he needs to go beyond children’s stories. I say good for him.

And the reason for the title of this post: Well, go look at the pictures.

I can’t believe he’s is only seventeen. There’s one with Daniel with a five o’clock shadow. The boy is growing up.

It seems that a new kind of war is looming, totally unexpected by all and sundry military experts: Queenan against Cohen. That is, Joe Queenan an American film critic vs. Sasha Baron Cohen the major piss taker on this side of XXth century.

A personal aside: I have never been Cohen’s cheerleader for both his main characters (Ali G. and Borat). There definitely were a few funny moments, and Borat at his early development stage has made a splash, especially when taking quite a few customers in a US watering hole for a ride with his “Throw the Jew down a well” song. Even in this latest movie there are a few genuinely funny moments, although I would not part with my hard earned 30+ shekels (about $7) to see it. I have already seen a few clips, and enough is enough. SBC has become a one trick pony, squeezing the last drop out of the Borat persona. Too rude and vulgar (even) for my taste in the majority of his latest tricks.

But here we have a case of a serious overreaction by a film critic who has gone postal. Witness the plethora of names he found for Cohen: “odious twit”, “pig”, “public school boy” (is it a crime nowadays?), “another odious twit from Cambridge” (a brilliant “aggregated” insult, should all Cambridge graduates join forces?) and, on top of that one, “Cambridge-educated Jackass” in another article. Mr. Queenan has obviously lost it on the way to his keyboard and since we are not acquainted (he may be a 300 pound gorilla for all I know), I wouldn’t want to find myself in his warpath these days. He is so mad at Borat and the whole world that even his fellow critics got bashed on the way: “annelids who masquerade as film critics at most US newspapers and magazines“. Annelids. Wow.

And what bothers Mr. Queenan in the opus of Sasha Baron Cohen? He briefly mentions a few deadly sins, such as sexism, homophobia and obsession with bodily functions (I don’t even know what to say, after all I am not as close to SBC as our film critic seems to be). He dedicated more time to what he perceives as Cohen’s hate of Americans. But at the conclusion of the article even this sin was waived: “Personally speaking, it does not bother me that Baron Cohen hates Americans; some of my best friends hate Americans.”

So what was it that enraged Mr. Queenan most of all? It’s simple: “But it bothers me that my fellow Americans are making yet another odious twit from Cambridge rich.” See how simple it is? Money, money, money…

And that rage, obviously, pulls our learned critic down to the gutter level in this passage:

But the men who flew the bombing raids over Berlin and the men who died at Omaha Beach and the women who built the Flying Fortresses and Sherman tanks that helped defeat Hitler are the very same people that Baron Cohen pisses all over in Borat. A lot of folks named Cohen would not even be here making anti-American movies if it were not for the hayseeds he despises.

Would it help if I reminded our enraged bull here that some of these “hayseeds” that died, built and helped were also named Cohen? Or it will only confuse him further? Or to remind him that, with all due respect, the hayseeds did not succeed to save a lot of these Cohens after all… Nah, waste of time.

I better continue his line of thought and add that if it were not for these hayseeds, he, Joe Queenan, would not be gainfully employed writing rumbling, illogical, hysterical and plainly stupid articles for the Guardian about the assorted Cohens. Could have been gainfully employed by Der Sturmer, though. Writing rumbling, illogical, hysterical and plainly stupid articles about the assorted Cohens…

The whole tempest in a teacup raises some questions:

• Why should a serious (?) film critic bother himself with such an obviously sub-standard production at all? Will a normal film critic waste his time on, say, “Jackass the movie”?
• Why is he raving like a lunatic? Anger management issues or simply a lunatic?
• And the most intriguing - why has the Guardian published this shit at all?

There is no accounting for tastes or for the lack of thereof, and the rage of our fine critic caused by the financial success of that movie is rather pitiful. One side of Joe Queenan shines brighter than anything else; as the Jew90 says, correctly: humorless buffoon.

Via Jew90

Cross-posted on SimplyJews.

Okay, folks. Now that I know the music in this LOTR video is from the film Requiem for a Dream, and now that I’ve listened to it about fifty times since yesterday, and now that I’ve read a bunch of reviews of the film, heard from two people at work who’ve seen it, and found out that yes, my Blockbuster carries a copy, here’s my question to those of you who have also seen the film:

Should I watch it?

One reviewer described the last 30 minutes as the most horrific moments in film. Everyone calls it “disturbing.”

I’m thinking I should just get the soundtrack and not see the movie, as I don’t do well with “disturbing.” I have a tendency to lose myself in the film, which is why I can’t stand scary or gory movies. They seem more real to me.

Thoughts, those of you who have seen the movie?

This post was originally published on June 6, 2005.

We caught up with the Dark Lord of the Sith, who took a few minutes out from his busy publicity schedule to talk with yourish.com.

MY: Well, the story is now complete, and your legion of fans knows how and why you stepped into the black suit.
DV: Ha. Ha. Ha. Very funny. I’ll bet you make bunny ears on blind people for laughs.
MY: Lord Vader, we’re curious to know what you think of the movies, and how your story has been told.
DV: You know the saying “History is written by the winners?”
MY: Yes.
DV: Hello, I didn’t win, y’know? That Lucas got almost nothing right, not even my name. I mean, Anakin? Annie? Annie? What kind of man calls himself Annie? First they get two of the worst actors in the universe to play my younger self, then they ruin my name and call me Annie! It’s enough to make you want to use your Sith powers to make sure that Lucas will never write another decent script so long as he lives.
MY: So what is your real name?
DV: It’s Leonard. Lennie! A nice manly name. None of this Annie crap.
MY: So what else did Lucas get wrong?
DV: I have never in my entire life—until now—ever uttered the word, “Yippee.” When Qui-Gon bought me out of slavery, I believe my words to Watto were more on the order of “[bleep] you, you stinking sack of [bleep] [bleep] [bleep]!”
MY: Whoa, family blog here!
DV: Edit it out, you [bleep].
MY: Lord Vader, how did you come to the dark side of the Force? What was it that really turned you bad? Was it truly your inability to find a good anger management class?
DV: Oh, don’t be ridiculous. The Sith Lords are no darker than your average Republicans. The Emperor wasn’t an Emperor, the Rebellion wasn’t a Rebellion. It was all politics. Palpatine won a closely contested election, and the Jedi got ticked. The Sith may have controlled the Chancellorship and the Senate, but the Jedi had the damned media behind them. And the academics, and they’re the ones who write the history books. The truth is, I started out with the Jedi, and Palpatine ultimately converted me to the Sith. The Sith political party, not some scary cult that went around lopping off people’s hands.

Plus, the Jedi were starting to talk about raising taxes and getting all touchy-feely on me. And then there was that insufferable Yoda. The creature never learned how to speak Galactic properly; always mangling his sentences. You have no idea how boring it was to sit in a Jedi council meeting and listen to him drone on and on. And Mace Windu? Listen, the man had fourteen mirrors in his home. Conceited? Hey, one of his padawans once pronounced his name Windoo instead of Windu, and Windu had him exiled to Tatooine to go undercover in Jabba the Hutt’s organization.
MY: Wait a minute, wait a minute—are you saying that the Sith and Jedi are only political parties? That there’s no Force behind either of them?
DV: Sorry to burst your bubble, bubelah, but I did tell you that Lucas got nearly everything wrong. And, ah, Palpatine and I didn’t kill the Jedi. The party died out of its own volition. There we are at war, and the Jedi are advocating diplomacy over force. Idiots. If someone’s shooting at you, saying, “Please stop shooting at me” has a proven one hundred percent failure rate. Come to think of it, the Sith and Jedi disagreements are not unlike the current battling going on between Republicans and Democrats, only our Jedi weren’t stupid enough to put a Howard Dean in charge. That snot-nosed son of mine—
MY: You mean Luke Skywalker really was your son? And he really defeated you in battle?
DV: I lost the election to him. You try and try to bring your kids up in your traditions, and the damned tree-huggers in the Jedi school system totally ruin them for you. He broke with me and ran on the Jedi ticket.
MY: You were elected?
DV: Of course. I was Palpatine’s Vice-Chancellor. We beat the Jedi twice, a fact that Lucas—who, I might point out, is a Democrat—seems to have overlooked in his films. But we didn’t win big, so Windu kept crying about a recount, then the lack of a mandate, and then the Jedi party used their influence in the media to beat up on us and make us look like the bad guys. They even tried to say we started the tariff war with the Trade Federation. So not our fault. We were all for free trade! It’s the Jedi that wanted to impose tariffs on everyone. So of course the Federation started taxing our goods. Everything started costing more, then my kids teamed up against me, and, well, you try to win an election when the cost of living is rising and your own kids are calling you Dark Father. After a while, people only heard “Darth Vader,” and that was that.
MY: I’m still trying to process this election stuff.
DV: Yeah, so are the Democrats. Get over it already.
MY: Okay, current Earth stuff: Bush or Kerry?
DV: Please. Bush.
MY: Favorite TV show?
DV: Lost. Oh, and Desperate Housewives. I’m a sucker for a nighttime soap.
MY: Who do you think will run for president in ‘08?
DV: Hillary. Definitely Hillary. Though she may find some surprises waiting for her.
MY: Meaning?
DV: Let’s just say that Luke and Leia weren’t my only kids. Padme may have dumped me, but she’s not the only fish in the sea. My second wife and I retired here after I lost the election, and, well, that’s all I’m saying for now. Except that he was born in the USA. And he’s a Republican.
MY: Thank you, Lord Vader, and, uh, may the—
DV: Oh, shut up.

Ilyka wrote a post about a topic that left me utterly speechless. Totally creeped out, but utterly speechless. Go over there and see for yourself what horrified me so much that I couldn’t write about it.

No, I’m not kidding.

Go. Read. Actually, much of her post is funny, so don’t be drinking. But go ahead. This is what good friends do for each other: They write the posts that the other can’t.

If I had a horror category, that’s what this post would go under.

And may I say, Ew. Ew to you, Dana Stevens. Just: Ew.

Update: And if you don’t click on the images at the bottom of the post, you will be missing the best part.

Patrick Stewart did play the mutant on life support in Moira MacTaggert’s scenes in X3.

And I recognized him from, er, his nekked chest. The one we saw in the Star Trek film where he climbed up a ladder, bare-chested.

It’s good to know that he wasn’t wearing chest prosthetics, like Ricardo Montalban did in ST2: The Wrath of Khan.

Patrick Stewart is a very sexy man. And that voice… I loves the baritones, I does.

There’s a reason it’s the box office champ. Actually, there are a lot of reasons. Let me count them. Wolverine, Storm, Magneto, Iceman, Shadowcat, Colossus, Pyro, Juggernaut, Mystique, Callisto, and yes, even the Beast. Oh, and Sentinels. Yes, there were Sentinels. References to Days of Future Past. Morlocks. Angel. Moira McTaggert, replete with mega-Scots accent. Hey, they even had the Evil Terrorist Wife from last season’s 24.

I can’t believe I’m saying this, but Kelsey Grammer made a halfway-decent Beast.

The Kitty Pryde character was great. I just love how she handled Juggernaut, whom they portrayed perfectly. It’s a laugh-out-loud moment.

Mind you, there are a few things in the plot that I didn’t like at all, particularly a few disappearances, but overall, wow. The Danger Room. They had a session in the Danger Room! (And fans of the X-Men knew it straight off. I sure did.)

I caught Stan Lee as soon as he showed up onscreen, but I did not know that Chris Claremont has a cameo as well. Now I’ll have to look for him when I go see the film again.

By the way, if you go see it, stay through the entire credits. It’s actually a scene I had a few problems with, but it’s probably important if you want to see X4.

Of course there will be an X4. X3 made $120 million over Memorial Day weekend, and broke the box office record for Friday, I think.

Overall, I’m a happy woman. Now I only have to wait about a month before seeing Johnny Depp and the Pirates of the Caribbean sequel.

Oh. Six commercials. We had to sit through six effing commercials. I hate Hollywood.

Update: Kindly put very long spoiler warnings in your comment if you intend to give away major plot points so soon after the film’s release.

On Tuesday night, I watched the first of the X-Men films. It’s been a long time, and I’d forgotten a lot of it, so it was rather delightful to see all over again. I remember thinking how incredibly annoyed I was that they left the Toad in Magneto’s brotherhood, but they did manage to make him interesting enough to bear. It was interesting, too, to see how they set up the Pyro character in that small bit in X-Men where he tries to launch a fireball at another student and Iceman freezes it.

I plan on watching X2 tonight, a film that I’ve seen more recently because it’s been all over the TV lately. Plus, it’s one of those films I tend to get hooked on if I’m channel-surfing and it appears.

And I will see X3 sometime this weekend. Unfortunately, I may not get to it until Sunday. B’nai Mitzvah season is upon me. The first one is this weekend, then there’s a break, then four in a row to fill out all of June. I’ve been invited to three of the five (two are newer students that I didn’t teach or meet until this year). That will be four of my first year’s class by the end of June. I think the twins are in August (on the same day, naturally). I know of one other in October. Not sure when Samantha’s bat mitzvah is. But from now on, I’ll be attending the b’nai mitzvot of my former students. But that’s okay. They’re going to have to attend mine in November of 2007.

As for the reviews of X3: Not interested. I will not be reading them, nor paying attention to anything anyone says. I’m going to see the movie and judge for myself.