Thursday briefs

I’m not apologizing because these boobs aren’t my fault: Okay, I know it’s a joke, but I don’t feel the least bit sorry about Anthony Weiner and Michael Bloomberg. They’re assholes, and they got there on their own. Of course, the other reason is this is a stupid article. Yom Kippur is all about atoning for your own sins, not for anyone else’s. Which is why this appears in the Tablet, and not in the Algemeiner. Tablet is more about Judaism Lite.

This one they can believe: Barack Obama may give the word “waffle” new relevance, but you can bet your last dollar that Israel will not allow a convoy of chemical weapons to go to Lebanon. There will be no transfer of WMD to Hezbullah on their watch. Obama should take note of how it’s done. Hint: Reference the bombing of the Syria nuclear reactor. Also, convoys in the Sudan.

Just in case you thought they were moderating, they’re not: 62% of Palestinians still support suicide bombings. That means six out of ten Palesitinans are perfectly okay with murdering civilians. It’s not like we’re suprised by that. What is surprising, perhaps, is that the Palestinians are the most bloodthirsty of all the poll respondents–by nearly twice as much as their nearest bloodthirsty neighbors, the Lebanese. Incitement in the Palestinian media? Yeah, we’ve got that. And boy, does it get results.

Oh, stop, Israel doesn’t help the U.S.: Israel is training U.S. Southwest border patrols members in bomb squad techniques. Why? Because Mexican drug cartels are now putting IEDs on our border. But sure, Glenn Greenwald is pushing the story that Israel spies on Americans with NSA-collected data. (I don’t believe it. I think there’s far more to the story than was published.) Because sure, let’s overstate the bad things and understand the good things that Israel does for the world.

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