Hamas senior got lost in the tunnels

The news appeared in Maariv’s Hebrew weekend edition on Friday Dec 16.

Maariv, using Palestinian Pal Press as their source, tells that Tahr Atwa, a senior Hamas functionary and a part-time commander in Izz ad-Din al-Qassam Brigades left Gaza five days ago to cross to Egypt, using the underground tunnels system. Recently his family received an anonymous phone call from Israel. The caller who presented himself as an intelligence officer, told the family that Mr Atwa is in Israel and recommended that they get a lawyer.

It was nothing, of course, for our operative to get into the location where Mr Atwa is kept. During the whole interview Mr Atwa was seething with rage, mostly directed at Fathi Hammad, Interior Minister of Gaza (and a part-time commander in Izz ad-Din al-Qassam Brigades).”Zionist lover, imperialist infidel lackey dog, the son of a thousand” were the mildest terms used by Mr Atwa to characterize Mr Hammad.

“I kept telling this …[omitted] that the …[omitted] tunnels have become a …[omitted] maze and a man can easily get lost. We have to have a clear set of signposts put into the tunnels. The no good …[omitted] has never moved his fat unwashed …[omitted]. When I get, Allah willing, back to Gaza, my people will kill his ass, raze his house and … [omitted] his wives and children…”

When our operative tried to placate Mr Atwa, telling him that he is, in all probability, not going home anytime soon and that Mr Hammad may expire meanwhile of a natural malady such as an acute lead poisoning, Mr Atwa’s rage boiled over and his power of coherent speech was lost.

The Mr Atwa’s jail officer, speaking on condition of anonymity (of course), told our operative that Mr Atwa keeps demanding to be provided with a bus ticket to Cairo and an exit visa immediately. “However, Mr Atwa doesn’t have a passport for us to put an exit visa in and, besides, the only banknotes he offers in exchange for the bus ticket are Egyptian pounds. Counterfeited, too”, the officer added.

Cross-posted on SimplyJews

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Daily job - software development. Hobbies - books, books, friends, simgle malt Scotch, lately this blogging plague. Amateur photographer, owned by 1. spouse, 2 - two grown-up (?) children and 3. two elderly cats - not necessarily in that order, it is rather fluid. Israeli.
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2 Responses to Hamas senior got lost in the tunnels

  1. Michael Lonie says:

    That is freaking hilarious. Laugh out loud funny.

    And he wanted to buy a bus ticket with counterfeit Egyptian money. More hilarity. I wonder if the Egyptians know that Hamas is counterfeiting Egyptian pounds and, if they do, do they care?

    Let Atwa spend a loooong time in an Israel prison, nursing his resentment against his colleague. Maybe Atwa’s kin in Gaza will assassinate the guy, which I assume is what the reference to lead poisoning refers to. Or an Israel missile might get him. There are all kinds of possibilities, including Hammad being captured by Israel. In that case put him in the same cell with Atwa. I’m sure they’ll have much to talk about.

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