Of course my mother, despite an otherwise very high cultural level, would watch us roll on the floor with laughter and say in exasperation, “But it’s just bad jokes and people throwing pies at each other,” and had the phrase been invented we would have replied, “Yes, and what’s your point?” And…I don’t like to brag…when I was about eight years old Willie the Worm, who lived in an apple core on Soupy’s lunch table, wished me happy birthday.

All I do is echo Soupy: “Always buy thermometers in the winter. They’re lower then.”