That’s about all I can say today. I appear to be a bit blocked in the posting regions, which is better than being blocked in other regions.
Talk amongst yourselves, about anything you want. But under no circumstances should anyone, say, post really bad jokes in the comments. Especially not elephant jokes.
An elephant walks into a bar and the bartender asks him “do you want a beer?”.
The elephant replies “noooooooooooooo”.
The bartender then asks him “do you want some beer nuts?”.
The elephant replies “nooooooooooooo”.
The bartender then asks him “do you want some food?”.
The elephant replies “noooooooooooooooooo”.
The bartender then gets frustrated and asks “HEY BUDDY, WHATS WITH THE LONG NOSE?”
How can you tell there’s an elephant hiding in your refrigerator?
The footprints in the cream cheese.
For several years, a man was having an affair with an Italian woman. One night, she confided in him that she was pregnant. Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, He paid her a large sum of money if she would go to Italy to secretly have the child. If she stayed in Italy to raise the child, he would also provide child support until the child turned 18. She agreed, but asked how he would know when the baby was born. To keep it discrete, he told her to simply mail him a post card, and write “Spaghetti” on the back. He would then arrange for the child support payments to begin.
One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife.”Honey,”she said, “you received a very strange post card today.” “Oh, just give it to me and I’ll explain it later,” he said. The wife obeyed and watched as her husband read the card, turned white, and fainted.
On the card was written:
“Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti. Three with meatballs, two without.
Send extra sauce.”
|What’ s grey, has four legs and jumps up and down?
An elephant on a trampoline!
What’s grey and wrinkly and jumps every twenty seconds?
An elephant with hiccups!
What’s grey and goes round and round?
An elephant in a washing machine!
What’s grey and highly dangerous?
An elephant with a machine gun!
What’s big and grey and lives in a lake in Scotland?
The Loch Ness Elephant!
What’s big and grey and has 16 wheels?An elephant on roller skates!
What goes up slowly and comes down quickly?
An elephant in a lift!
What’s as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?
An elephant’s shadow!
Hehehe. Thanks.
Q: Why do elephants drink so much?
A: To try to forget.
This was an appropriate time for elephant jokes.
What is gthe connection of elepants with this week’s parsha?
The elephant has no trouble with fulfilling the mitzvah of Zecher Amalek.
After all, “an elephant never forgets”.
Just like we puth the name of Haman on our shoes (in chalk) to stamp out Amalek, an elephant has no trouble after it stamps on him in making sure that it has been eradicated.
Chag Purim Sameach.
The shabbos of Parshas Tetzve was Parshas Zachor and is appropriate for elephant jokes.
What mitzvah is an elephant uniquely qulified to fulfill?
Zachor es Amalek – Lo Tishkach.
An elephant never forgets.
Q. What’s gray and grins from ear to ear?
A. An elephant gazing at Gracie and Tig.