Check out this sign at a car wash across from the restaurant where Sarah and I ate lunch on EATAPETA Day.

Notice anything a bit strange about the sign?

Nope. Not the typo.

“Ye Olde Laser Car Wash.”

Yeah, when I think “laser,” the first thing I think is, “Gee, that’s so ten minutes ago.”

You really have to wonder at the Brainiacs who think up signs like these. I’m thinking they rode the short bus to school.

The Palestinian Space Program launched an Iranian model 122mm Katyusha rocket into Israel on election day:

Remains of the rocket were discovered in searches of areas hit by rockets south of Ashkelon.

Military sources said the potential range of the Katyusha is some 15 kilometers, about six kilometers longer than that of the Qassam.

This would place a much larger number of Israeli towns and villages in danger of being hit by rockets fired from the Gaza Strip, including the southern coastal city of Ashkelon.

It is believed that the Katyusha fired from Gaza was smuggled into the Strip, apparently across the Gaza-Egypt border from Sinai.

When it comes time for the Palestinian Space Program to expand into manned experimental flight missions, maybe the EU observers at the Rafah Crossing could be used as test subjects instead of wasting perfectly good chimpanzees or dogs?

A Katyusha rocket that originated in Iran landed in Israel today.

A Katyusha rocket with a 122 millimeter diameter was fired from northern Gaza and landed south of Ashkelon. There were no injuries. This is the first time that a terror organization in Gaza has used this type of Katyusha rocket in an attack.

The rocket is more accurate than the Qassam. At the same time, industrial explosives were found in the explosive. The Katyusha is used by Hizbullah and originates from Iran. (Hanan Greenberg and Shmulik Hadad)

This would be the day after Fatah said they were gunning for Ashkelon with newer, better rockets.

There are no peace partners, only enemies. Not that you could tell from the mainstream media. The AP ignores Hamas’ rejectionism, choosing to focus on their so-called moderation.

He said the Palestinians retained the right to resist Israel’s occupation, but suggested that he was not interested in perpetuating the cycle of violence with Israel.

“We’re not calling for conflict or the continuation of the bloodbath in this region. We are a government that looks out for the interests of the Palestinian people,” he said. He added that he intended to push for an independent Palestinian state with its capital in Jerusalem and the right of Palestinian refugees to return to their homes in what is now Israel.

Those demands are far more moderate than Hamas’ traditional call to replace Israel with an Islamic state. However, the group, which won Jan. 25 elections in a landslide, has stopped far short of accepting demands by the international community to renounce violence and recognize Israel’s right to exist.

Those demands are not any more moderate. They simply don’t call for death, only for Israel’s destruction by demographics. The deaths, of course, would follow. But the AP also did not include quotes like this:

“The Koran is our constitution, Jihad is our way, and death for the sake of God is our highest aspiration,” Hamas lawmaker Hamed Bitawi said.

Interestingly, that was in Reuters.

So were these quotes from the “pragmatist” Haniyeh:

In contrast on Tuesday, Haniyeh said: “We were born from the womb of resistance, we will protect resistance and the arm of resistance will not be touched,” said Haniyeh.

Addressing Mariam Farhat, a newly-elected Hamas lawmaker whose three sons died fighting Israel, Haniyeh said: “This the fruit of the sacrifices by martyrs, including your sons. You’ve got to be proud of this day.”

Some day, the AP will stop lying to its readers and publish the unvarnished truth: Hamas is a group of unrelenting terrorists whose aim is the complete and utter destruction of the Jewish State, and the installation of the Islamic Caliphate over its ashes. Nothing less will do for them.

Iran is now funding Hamas as well as Hezbullah, the Shi’ites in Iraq, and just about any other anti-Israel and anti-Western group they can find. George W. Bush was not wrong to include them in an Axis of Evil.

Ever watchful Guardian (slow day or what?) reports:

The discovery in Liverpool of two fish apparently bearing the Arabic script for “Allah” and “Muhammad” has been hailed as a miracle by Ali al-Waqedi, who spotted the Oscar fish in a local pet shop, writes Tomi Ajayi.

Islam prohibits images of Allah, so Muslim miracle claims commonly take the form of Arabic letters spelling out the name of Allah. The 2004 miracle lamb episode featured a Palestinian lamb that appeared to have a birthmark spelling Allah in Arabic.

The picture of the sacred fishes attached:

Myself being a carnivore, I would prefer a saddle of lamb, but a good bouillabaisse is not totally out of the question.

Cross-posted on SimplyJews

This is a link to some pretty funny commentary on some pretty awful comic books. Just go to the comic book cover link and you’ll be on the floor in less than a minute. The funniest thing is, I used to have a few of those comics. I left ‘em in NJ. (They were worthless; I took all the valuable ones with me.) Y’know, I just remembered — my cousins and I used to have so much fun just reading comic books out loud, because of all those stupid “Tee=hee” and “>choke<” sound effects.

I was thinking y’all could use this post as an open thread to post links to funny websites. Please include a “Not safe for work” tag if need be.

Allison Kaplan Summer is liveblogging them, as is the hyperactive crew at Vital Perspective. So is Aussie Dave.

I’ll be peeking into various sites throughout the day, but if you want the scoop, visit these folks.

The Arab League is calling on Israel to go back to the Quartet-led talks. Oh,and they’re also telling Israel not to make any unilateral decisions. This is going to have a great effect on Israel’s policy, as the Arab League is known for its influence on decisions taken by Israel.

Oh, wait. That must be Bizarro-Universe Israel. My bad.

Voter turnout for this election is the lowest in Israeli history. I think that’s because it’s a choice between bad, bad, and bad policy. It isn’t even the lesser of the three evils. All of their policies stink. But then, the situation stinks. Ariel Sharon is in a coma and isn’t coming out of it. There is no palestinian peace partner, if there ever was one (which I doubt). So how can you have negotiations without someone to negotiate with? So you make unilateral decisions, but they make you look weak in your non-peace-partner’s eyes, so the attacks continue. All the while, no matter what you do, the world hates you. I’m thinking I understand perfectly the lack of voters out there. Hold your nose and pull the lever, or don’t bother and just gripe about what happens? Israelis like to gripe a lot. They must. They’re Jewish, aren’t they?

Meantime, the world’s approach towards Hamas continues, in spite of words like this:

In Gaza, Hamas officials said the election results would have no effect on their hostility toward Israel.

“We are not differentiating between this party and that,” said Mahmoud Zahar, the incoming Palestinian foreign minister. “All of them committed crimes against the Palestinian people.”

And this:

Hamas leader and former Imam of Al Quds Mosque Shaikh Mohammad Mehmood Al Siyam has said Hamas will not abandon the path of jihad despite its sweeping victory in the Palestinian general elections. “Hamas cannot think of abandoning jihad against the Jewish occupation forces,” he said.

“We will never let the Jews rule Palestinian territories,” the Hamas leader said while speaking at the concluding session of the Jamaat-i-Islami’s grand assembly at the Wapda Colony near here on Saturday night.

This is why Israel is building the fence, and declaring borders. Because there is no peace partner, and no matter what Israel does, the palestinians will not be satisfied. It’s a lose-lose situation. The question is, can the new borders stop the rockets from falling on Ashkelon? (Hebrew link)

The engineering and military industries sections of Fatah’s Al-Aqsa Brigades announced Sunday the start of a new military offensive against the Israeli city of Ashkelon, to be called “Volcano Fire.”

The announcement claimed that the group had improved the range of its rockets from 12 to 18 km, which would reach all of Ashkelon.

The Al-Aqsa Brigades announced a plan to fire 100 of the new rockets and 80 mortars at Ashkelon.

If you ask me, the biggest challenge facing the new Prime Minister will be how to stop palestinian attacks. Which is, well, the same problem that has faced every leader of Israel since 1948.

Why, exactly, was this man taken from his Jericho prison and brought to Israel? You wouldn’t know if you read only this AP article. Oh, you’d know it’s because he’s wanted for the assassination of an Israeli minister — but it sure looks like Israel just swooped in and stole this man out of prison for no apparent reason.

Ahmed Saadat and four of his alleged accomplices in the 2001 assassination of an Israeli Cabinet minister were seized in an Israeli army swoop on Jericho prison, action that triggered reprisal attacks from angered Palestinians.

At his brief court appearance Monday, Saadat refused to recognize the military tribunal’s authority to try him and the judge, in turn, refused to hear his bail application. When he was led into court, Sadat raised his hands in a gesture of defiance and shouted in Arabic, “I am fighting occupation! ” before he was silenced by guards.

The Israeli army stormed the prison on March 14, two weeks before Israel’s general election. The raid boosted acting Prime Minister Ehud Olmert’s image as a tough-minded leader. Defense Minister Shaul Mofaz, a member of Olmert’s centrist Kadima Party, dismissed allegations that the operation, which involved some 1,000 troops, was timed to win over hardline voters.

But the raid angered Palestinians, who staged protests strikes the day after, and embarrassed Palestinian President Mahmoud Abbas, who labeled it an “unforgivable crime” and “an insult to the Palestinian people.”

The raid triggered unprecedented Palestinian reprisals against foreigners, because British wardens - who along with American monitors had supervised the Jericho prisoners under an unusual 2002 arrangement - left their posts just before Israeli troops arrived.

Notice how they make sure to blame Israel for the palestinian “reprisals,” and yet, not once did they mention that the pals were about to release Saadat and his henchman. It was done, obviously, as an election ploy.

The kindest thing I can say about this is that the AP sucks eggs. Rotten ones.